Who lives, Who Cries, Who gets Pregnant
by perFANfection
Summary: Eight years later, Amelia and Owen find themselves suddenly thrown aback when Owen's vasectomy fails despite their agreement to put their careers first. But despite life's unexpected twist, Amelia looks to her sisters and later teams up with them when they discover that Zola has a secret too beneath her sudden, mysterious behavior and change of heart.
1. Chapter 1

"Amelia, what is all this clutter?" Meredith remarks as she watches her rummage through the cabinet beneath her bathroom sink, clearly on a mission.

Amelia continued to ignore her as she threw things left and right, finding old bath toys, a swim diaper that had to be at least seven years old, and some of Bailey's and Zola's old bath towels. She didn't see Meredith as the sentimental type to keep their old bath towels with the ducky hoods, but then again, she was a single mother, hoarding everything she could for her youngest to make it work. With the help of Maggie and Alex, she was making it work.

"Where do you keep your pregnancy tests?!" She asks frantically, tossing another box of tampons to the side, every individual one flying in opposite directions.

Meredith sets down their new puppy whom she had found peeing on the wooden hall floor, watching him crawl towards the tampons to put in his mouth and she shoos him, taking the hygiene products and collecting them back into the box. She then shut the door behind the curious pup, pushing Amelia's frantic hands back into her lap and closing the wooden cabinet door.

"I don't know Amelia, maybe because I thought we were all well past our child bearing years. Why would I have some? To encourage my sixteen year old daughter to use them?" She replies smartly, her words carefully and cynically laced to make a point.

"No, because we're doctors." Amelia deadpans as if it was obvious, like all doctors should have them.

"Then why don't you have any?" Meredith retorts, helping Amelia to her feet, and watching as she leaned back against the counter.

Amelia blew air out of her rouge colored cheeks, clearly not in the mood for their sisterly banter. She had had a fight with Owen the night before, bringing up the possibility of having kids again after they had put it on the back burner again. She told Owen how she felt towards having to go through a tragedy again, even though neither good or bad was guaranteed. And after she realized that they still weren't ready she freaked out, leaving Owen confused to why they had even brought it up in the first place.

"Owen and I got into a fight last night, so I stayed the night here." Amelia lets out an exasperated breath. "Where are they?!"

"I thought Owen had a vasectomy when you decided you didn't want kids at all." Meredith interrogates, trying to be helpful by understanding where she was coming from.

"I might have stopped my birth control too soon... like as soon as we decided he would get when I mentioned I had stopped taking them, he panicked. He belittled me for being irresponsible for not taking them when the doctor even warned me not to stop it too soon. For not waiting until he was fully- you know, healed."

Amelia wrings her hands together, sheepishly sharing this information as if the two weren't doctors who saw unexpected pregnancies in their cases everyday. As if pregnancy were taboo and they didn't have patients who were under the knife who they didn't know about the baby until it was too late.

"What did he say to that? Is it even possible for you to be pregnant?" Meredith insists, cutting the tense silence with her sharp tone of voice.

"Because as doctors, it doesn't mean we're inhuman or immune to mistakes. My doctor told me to stay on birth control until he was healed but…" She implies, blushing sheepishly.

"You couldn't wait?"

"When I saw that spark of excitement in his eyes, like when he started to suspect what I was trying to say, I panicked and backed out. Told him I wasn't ready and wasn't sure I'd ever be;That if we couldn't have had a kid years ago, we certainly shouldn't now."

"Amelia," She coos, slight disappointment laced in her voice.

"Just promise me Mer, you won't say anything to him until anythings for sure. Because I can't stand to see him disappointed again and live with guilt when the test comes back negative. Because I'll be relieved, but it'll kill him if he has to live through it again."

"Nothing is for certain and you can't possibly be always prepared for whatever life throws at you. As doctors, we can do the check up, have clean labs and still get to the OR and have the possibility that the patient codes on the table."

Amelia kicks her foot back and forth across the linoleum floor, brushing all the toys to the side, then bringing them back with the side of her foot. She knew Meredith was usually always right and always kept things in a realistic perspective, unlike Maggie, who would surely just focus on all the good, forgetting the fact that there was an actually problem that wasn't being solved. Maggie was sunshine and rainbows, a hoverer who liked to keep only the perspective on good, while Meredith was open-minded and viewed the problems from all sides, without an overly optimistic view.

"There's always the unknown, the unpredictable, the uncontrollable. You can feel fully prepared but really never actually be. The best thing you can do is except what comes at you and trust that God will bring you through it. How you handle it is really what matters, it shows character, and is the only thing you can control."

Before either one had a chance to fill the sudden silence, Zola began to bicker with Bailey, shoving him to the side so that she could fill her backpack with her textbooks and laptop for school. The house that once was a somber and quiet place for adults to converse had been turned into a "Crazy Cat Lady" house, with children instead of cats, leaving marks of their presence with toys scattered amongst the house.

"Here's what you do: There's pregnancy tests in our supply closet, which I hope you already knew. Take one and report back to me, and we'll figure something out from there. But Owen is your husband. I'm not going to tell you what to say to him, I'm just here to listen if you are pregnant." Meredith informs her as she unlocks the bathroom door and shoves her into the hall, brushing themselves past the kids who had been impatiently waiting to leave.

"Wait- Mer! What do I do if it's positive? How do I tell Owen?" She chases after Meredith as she takes long strides towards the kitchen.

"You're a neurosurgeon, use your head." Meredith responds smartly, then her face softens a bit. "Relax, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. But I can't talk to Owen for you. He wants to hear from you, his wife, and not me." She reminds her firmly, before shimmying her purse up her arm and nudging the kids through the door, lunch boxes in hand.

 **-XXX-**

Maggie's biggest regret in her career, well actually, she couldn't talk about it, but hitting a patient was in her top ten. She had been sent home after having a rough day, unable to get her focus back after instinctively slapping Owen in defense of Amelia when he began yelling. He had one of each of her wrists wrapped in his fists, but little did she know that Owen's PTSD was troubling him after all they have been through.

At least not at the time when he turned to tell her to leave and she took to the chastening as a threat. Sweet Maggie Pierce couldn't handle seeing her sister taking the blow of his anger and with a simple misunderstanding she took her aim, slapping him as he began reaches hands just to simply set them on her shoulder. He didn't know what he was doing and she didn't understand that. Immediately, she felt awful.

After realizing what she had done, she profusely apologized and blatantly excused herself with the mutual understanding that she should, and will, go home to recollect herself. So she walked through the door of her dead birth mom's house, still a weird feeling even after almost eight years of doing it.

She threw down her keys and medical ID, kicking off her shoes and walking half-dead to the kitchen, fixing for a glass of wine to hopefully help ease her guilt of what she had done. She hadn't known what the fight had been fully about but as her usual, hovering, overbearing self, she just wanted to do what's right. Unfortunately, that hadn't entailed hitting her ex brother-in-law.

"Aunt Maggie?" She suddenly hears a voice from the other room, backtracking towards the living room where she had thought she heard the familiar voice.

"Zola?" She confirms with surprise, finding the teenager in her bathrobe, wrapping her skinny fingers around the mug of something that she could see was still steaming, freshly made.

"Does your mother know you're here? Shouldn't you be in school?" She interrogates with worry laced in her gentle voice. "We've gotta get you back." She begins to pack her stuff up, stopping when she realized Zola wasn't making an effort, neither paying attention.

Zola stares into the steam rising above her tea, darting her eyes away from her aunts as her cheeks blush with shame. But of all the people she was glad it was Maggie, because her mother would not want to hear this after her 48 hour shift and Amelia had problems of her own. She shakes her head, hoping that Maggie will continue to guess what was wrong so she wouldn't have to say it.

Zola continued to pull at her curls, watching out of the corner of her eye as the coils bounced back to their original form. After watching this for a few minutes, Maggie grabbed Zola's hands in hers, setting them down on her lap.

"Zola, you can talk to me about anything. I may not be the 'Cool' aunt like Amelia, but you know you can tell me anything, no judgement." Maggie's soft voice coos reassuringly.

Zola's lip quivers, feeling shaky from the inside out as her breathing quickens and heart pounds in her ears. She knew her aunt wouldn't like to hear this but for goodness sake, she was a doctor and was used to seeing harsh things and delivering disappointment to grieving families.

"Aunt Maggie," Her voice shakes with hesitance, then she takes a deep breath. "Annice dumped me."

Maggie stares at Zola in disbelief for a few seconds before letting out a small laugh with relief, bringing the small girl into a gentle hug. Zola pulled away in dismay, unamused by her aunt's reaction. She held the same, emotionless glare in her eyes as Maggie began rambling on, thinking of ways she could help Zola through her first "real" break-up.

"Well with a name like that, it wasn't like he was exactly a keeper." Maggie jokes and Zola raises her eyebrow. "It's kind of embarrassing." She adds in a comical whisper, as if she didn't want him to hear it.

"Clive?" Zola reminds her sassily and Maggie immediately shuts up in defeat.

"So this is why you skipped? Because you crap-head of a boyfriend dumped you? Sweetie, I deal with broken hearts everyday. They may be quite literally broken, but it doesn't mean I don't know how to help a young girl with a metaphorically broken one." She comforts her as Zola leans into aunt's arms, resting her head on her shoulder.

Zola's face hardens as she tries to refrain the heavy sobs from escaping, unable to see that Maggie was really trying to connect with her niece, wishing that she would open up to her the way she used to. Maybe it was the angsty teen years or whatever, but she wanted so desperately to help her.

"Z-bug, you know you can tell me anything that's on your mind and it wouldn't make me love you any less." She brushes the matted curls from her niece's face, Zola only burying her face deeper into the crease of Maggie's shoulder, soaking through her dark blue scrubs.

"Aunt Maggie, I can't come back from this; I really done messed up."

"Life is full of second chances, it's how you learn from your mistakes and grow from them that counts."

"Annice dumped me." She repeats, sobbing harder.

"I know sweetie, it hurts." She soothes her, squeezing her body closer.

Zola's body was as stiff as a cardboard, resisting her real emotions from coming out but she knew subconsciously that in this house she was safe. She believed, or at least wanted to think that she could tell them anything because after their long medical careers, this wasn't the craziest thing they have heard or seen. So she let her body go limber, let her emotions out, and let Maggie console her as she did so.

"Maggie?" She wipes her tears and look up at her aunt. "He would have made a terrible future husband and an even worse father. All he cared about was how we would look to the football team, to him as a cornerback."

She dragged her sleeve across her nose in an attempt to stop her nose from running before continuing through her now acute sobs. Maggie listened profusely, being careful not to interrupt until she was sure that she was done.

"And when things went down between us, I was just the chick he wore on his arm to make him look better to his buddies. That he would belittle and make me feel inferior in this relationship. That I was to be seen and not heard when around his buddies, and made me believe that none of my friends wanted me either." She pushed her face back into her aunt, a signal that Maggie took as she was done talking.

"Oh sweetheart, if he was using you to boost his ego, then don't you think it's healthier this way?" She watches as Zola cringes at the thought, then continues.

"I know every girl your age must think you've found the 'one', but in high school you shouldn't be worrying about who you're gonna marry as much as who you wanna be. High school is a time of self discovery, and that's already enough pressure on one soul. Don't spend your time trying to change who you are when you don't even know yet."

Meredith had found Derek when she was just an intern, and Zola dreamed of a love story not quite as morbid or messed up as her mom's or even Ellis'. Even with her mom's warning that she and her father weren't perfect at first, and that love wasn't always at first sight or whatever, her happy ending was coming, even if the road there wasn't so pleasant. But that was life, rough and jagged roads leading you to where you're really supposed to be and even finding the one wasn't a promise that life would get any easier after that. And deep down, Zola knew that. She knew Annice was a egotistical jerk, with a really terrible name for someone who thought so highly of himself.

Zola had grown to be quite a mature and beautiful girl, Meredith only wishing her dad could see her now. Her saucer shaped, deep brown eyes still retained a child-like innocent look to them, but her cheekbones were high with a natural yellowish glow to them.

She wore little makeup, but some blush and highlight, as well as mascara on her long, curly lashes. She was a beautiful young lady, well rounded, straight A student because she knew how important education was. This one mistake didn't define her, or rather wouldn't because she had yet to see what the future would bring.

"Zola, is there anything I can do to help you?" Maggie finally breaks the silence as she feels her niece relaxing in her arms, the sobs coming to a gentle hault.

"There's one more thing; Please don't freak." Zola hold real warning in her voice, not just teenage, "I'm gonna get in trouble for sneaking out", but actual fear.

"Anything Zo, I'm all ears."

"I wanna transfer schools, preferably an all girls private school. We can do that right?"

Maggie just stares with disbelief at her, more surprised that she would want to move in the middle of the school year, only a few month left. Zola was set to graduate as a junior next year, already credits ahead of her peers. The sudden change had to be irrational, it had to be because she was a teenage girl with a broken heart, not because she actually saw it as a change for the better. This was coming from nowhere, and Maggie tried to reason that.

"This isn't because you just had your heartbroken and you're mad at like, boys and the world and things right now? You actual have a reason backing this?" Maggie can't wrap her head around it, interrogating her niece on the 'why'.

"Aunt Maggie, I need a change that would be healthier for me."

"You're not getting bullied, are you?" Maggie suddenly gets defensive and sits up straighter, a renewed interest in the conversation.

"No Aunt Maggie." She rolls her eyes before reaching down, digging a flyer and some paperwork from her orange folder and handing it to her aunt.

Maggie stares wide eyed at the flyer, her head suddenly spinning into space as she struggles to retain the information and wrap her mind around it. Not specifically what she had read was as difficult to comprehend as everything else. She sat speechless, staring at it long after Zola had retreated to the bathroom, Maggie hearing the _click_ and not seeing her for a long time after that.

She could only heard Zola's loud sobs over the shower water, her heart breaking despite what she had just seen, because in her mind, Zola was still that same little girl she had met and loved immediately years ago. She knew how Meredith would come home later, throwing her tired self onto the couch, scrubs and all into a lump, sleeping until the morning came and she had to start again.

Meredith had the day off so she had time to stew on the subject, but she knew it wasn't her place to change Meredith's mind, just help support Zola. Honestly she knew that's how Meredith and Amelia would see it too, after the initial shock of their straight A child wanting to transfer.

"Oh Zo-Zo, you will still make an amazing surgeon or whatever you want to be someday. But I'm confident whatever it is, you'll make us proud." Maggie whispers, hugging the flyer to her chest.


	2. You've done messed up

Amelia tread along the tile floor of the bathroom, carefully pacing her steps with the tick of the timer on her phone outside the door as she waited. Outside the door was Meredith and Maggie, despite Amelia not wanting Maggie to know right away because she would then hover over her if she was pregnant. But after careful consideration she let Maggie know too, because after all she was family, and also the first to know when Amelia had a brain tumor. She wasn't over dramatic or over bearing then, so she decided having Maggie there would be for the best, especially if or when she had to tell Owen.

"Maggie? What does the time say?" Meredith whispers, careful not for Amelia to hear in attempt not to panic her.

"Two minutes." She informs her in a whisper, pausing to see if she could still hear Amelia's footsteps on the linoleum. They had paused.

"Two minutes?!" Amelia remarked stressfully, clearly able to hear everything despite not wanting to.

Meredith and Maggie weren't sure whether or not to comfort her, talk about other things, or just keep quiet. Meredith opted to keep quiet while all Maggie wanted to do was her thing: Hover.

"You know Amelia, this might be for the best."

"Getting pregnant at forty-two is what's best? For who Maggie?" She snaps, not buying it.

"I don't know, maybe because children are blessings and God handmade this one for you! Aren't you excited to watch him or her grow up with their cousins? And babies are squishy and tiny and…" Maggie goes on, only to be cut off.

"Okay Maggie, that's enough." Meredith gently tells her, taking over. "I think what sunshine and rainbows over here is saying, _if_ you are pregnant, it's going to be okay, whatever you decide. If you put them up for adoption to pursue your career, or choose to keep them, you'll have all the support you'll need, here."

Maggie nods in silent agreement, but also feels a wave of guilt rush over her. Somedays it felt like Meredith knew everything, the answers to your problems, what was going on in your life. But the fact that she still didn't know about Zola wanting to leave her school killed her because without her mom and Amelia knowing, Maggie felt like Zola wouldn't get all the support she needed either.

"If you need to, you can move back in with us. But only if you and Owen absolutely can't work things out. No running away from this, do you hear me, Amelia Shepherd?" Meredith chastens in her 'mom' voice.

"Um Mer- I think there's something we also need to talk about." Maggie interrupts again.

Suddenly the timer goes off and scares Maggie out of her thoughts, forgetting the well rehearsed conversation she had constructed in her head, only to miss out on the right time. She hears nothing from the other side of the door, wondering if Amelia had looked or not.

"Amy? What does it say?" Meredith hesitantly nags, waiting for her to be ready.

The door creaks open, Amelia shakily holding the test in one hand while wiping tears with her other. Maggie and Meredith scoot over, leaving a space for her between them. Maggie instinctively puts her arm around Amelia, staring down at the test with her, as the digital loading bar continues to flash.

"Invalid?" Amelia asks, when she was really hoping for ' _not pregnant'_ to appear on the screen.

"These are usually pretty accurate; Maybe you just did it wrong?" Maggie suggests, a little too cheerful and hopeful for the others.

Amelia looks up and begins to respond angrily, an array of built up and frustrated emotions suddenly pouring out.

"You're trying to tell me, a neurosurgeon, that I used a pee sick wrong?!" Her exasperation boils over into laughter of disbelief, then hysteria.

"Why don't you go to bed and take another in the morning; Your morning urine should have the strongest levels of hormones if you're pregnant." Meredith intervenes the sudden blown of rage in an attempt to calm her, gesturing for her take the test to her room as if she was a child being sent to timeout.

Meredith turns to Maggie who just watches Amelia walk away, saddened by her failed attempt at calming her sister. Meredith then stands, but before walking away, shakes her head at her.

"No offense Maggie, but you're most certainly the wrong person for this moment." She laughs in defeat, turning on her heels to walk away.

 **-XXX-**

"Aunt Maggie?" A tearful and frantic Zola flies through the front door after school, searching frantically for her around the house.

"Zola? Don't you have practice until seven?" Amelia walks in, toothbrush in hand and sweatpants replacing her scrubs.

Amelia looked extremely comfortable and laid back, not to mention that as she looked barely put together she still was absolutely beautiful, something Zola secretly envied of her aunt. But despite Amelia looking stunning, the house did not. Amelia's boxes were scattered amongst the counters and couch, ripped open with clothes hanging limply out the sides.

"Are you moving back in? What about Owen?"

"It would appear so," Amelia looks around, noting her boxes. "Owen and I had a little fallout, but we're working on it. So for the time being, I'll be living here, if that's okay with you." Amelia reassures her, not really looking for Zola's opinion on her current living situation.

"But you can't just run away when things get tough; You've got to wait it out, and find ways to resolve conflict." Zola pleas.

"Big words from a little miss who ran away the day of her piano recital and never wanted to go back." Amelia laughs, her back facing towards Zola as she unpacked some more.

"I'm not a quitter." She quietly sulked in defense.

Amelia turns around and hands Zola a box to begin, and Zola takes it happily, hoping the unpacking will fill the silence. But it was eating her alive, the guilt, and also the curiosity what her aunt could be going through. It brought her comfort knowing that they could talk about anything, and they could use the hard time to be there for each other, but she knew Amelia's problems with Owen were far too adult for her.

"So Zo Zo, what's been up with you lately?" Amelia breaks the silence, smirking to herself as Zola jumps.

"Nothing's wrong. Why would you assume that?" She stutters.

"No one's giving you a hard time? No friends or specific boys?" She hints and Zola jokingly shoves her, relief flooding over her.

"Arnice dumped me; He wasn't ready to handle the responsibilities of our relationship and stuff. Total loser."

"Sounds like that to me." Amelia laughs, pulling Zola into a side hug. "You know, high school is a tough time for discovering who you are. You have hours of homework, extracurriculars, worrying about colleges! You really don't need to worry about boyfriends and taking care of his needs when he can't take care of himself and that huge ego of his."

Maggie had told her the same thing about house school, and the conversations about grades and how important school was on a constant loop in this house, Zola and her siblings knowing from a young age how important it was to finish. They were by no means expected to be surgeons or whatever, they could do what they dreamed, they were encouraged to pursue their own things.

So when she decided to drop out of a school and go to another as an attempt for a clean slate where no one knew her and didn't have high expectations like every other one of her classmates seemed to have. She wasn't 'Harper Avery winning', Meredith Grey's kid, she was just another one of them. Except she wasn't, and they all would eventually know that. But she hoped that they would like her for who she was and not her mother before making any other judgements.

"For starters, aunt Amelia, I don't want to be a legacy. I don't want to be just "award winning- Meredith Grey's" kid, I want a clean slate where people can get to know me and love me for me, before they make any judgement about my current situations."

Amelia raises a brow at the her use of _Situations,_ and gestures for her niece to sit down, but Zola refuses.

"Z, what do you mean ' _situations'_?"

Zola sat down on the couch, folding and unfolding again and again one of Amelia's shirts. She creased the folds, then un-did it again, starting the process over. Amelia could see the worry and unusual hesitancy and sadness on her face.

"Amelia, I've messed up." Zola mumbled in one breath, looking as if that was all she was gonna say.

"What did you do? I'm sure whatever it is, we can work through it." She encourages, suddenly more invested into the conversation.

Zola just begins to cry again and Amelia throws an arm around her, pulling her boy-crazed, overly emotional niece into her. She was only sixteen after all, and these mood-swings and whatever were expected. Zola's attitude was that of a normal teenager, and the women in the house worked at keeping respect to each other as a must despite her raging hormones. She fought with her siblings like anyone else, but she never reached a point where she began shutting people out completely until now.

"Aunt Amelia, with all due respect, I'm not going to talk to you about this."

"C'mon Zo, we both know how messed up my life's been. Hit me with whatever you've got because I've got no room to judge.

Zola begins to stand, setting the shirt neatly on the couch and walks away, pausing on the landing before the steps.

"Thanks anyways, Aunt Amy." She politely smiles before continuing up the stairs.

"You're more than just a legacy kid. You're your own person, and their expectations shouldn't be just that you're automatically perfect because you're some legacy's kid."

Zola kicks off her converse, flopping back on her bed before pulling out her phone to text Sofia.

' **Have you talked to Arizona yet?'** Zola writes, tapping her fingers impatiently on her phone screen before sending.

Her phone buzzes almost immediately and she jumps, scrabbling to unlock it and sits up.

' **Yes, she can get you in tom. nine? Don't worry, your secret is safe with my mom.'** She replies and Zola sighs in relief, her only obstacle now figuring out how to enter the hospital without making her mom suspicious.

Zola thanks her and jumps out of bed, tiptoeing down the hall to make sure Amelia didn't know she was out of her room in fear that she would try talking again and into the bathroom. She locked the door behind her and rummaged through the bottom cabinet, looking for the box of tampons she had pushed towards the back.

Typically she had hid things she didn't want her siblings to find, like candy or things from Arnice. This same box had been under her side of the cabinet for years, and for years she would by the same brand and box to place in front because that's where all the women would grab from. But today was different; It wasn't a tampon or candy or whatever she was looking for. She found the object almost immediately and pulling it out, unfolding the flyer on STI's and unplanned pregnancy and sighed.

Tomorrow Arizona would find out who Zola felt she really was after all this, and it guilted her. Arizona would look for diseases and thought on the outside she was a kind blue-eyed soul, she worried her friends mom wouldn't allow Sofia over anymore. It was completely irrational, but her anxiety was getting the best of her thoughts and mind. She felt ashamed, scared, fearful, dirty, only for starters.

Where was her common sense? The one she should be equipped with because her family members are or were doctors and everyone would see that too. A girl with this many resources should know better. She should be more careful. She shouldn't be…

"Pregnant." She whispers before shaking the test and throwing it against the shower wall. "I should've known better."

 **-XXX-**

Maggie called Zola into school the next day, agreeing to bring her siblings to school first then sneaking her off to the hospital for what her mom would only hear as a gynecology appointment when the bill came. But Zola knew it was much more.

"Are you positive you don't want your mom here?" Arizona asks for reassurance just as Maggie had, and she only shook her head profusely, adamant about it. "Okay, I'll start by taking some blood- It'll only pinch a little." Arizona laughs as she sees the sudden fearful look painted on Zola's face.

Zola subconsciously curls her free hand into a fist before feeling a warm hand try to pry her fingers apart, Zola feeling the sudden warmth and comfort of Maggie's hand in hers, a reassuring smile on her face. She felt her body become less tense and some relief wash over her, remember that Maggie had been her person.

She never could find a friend that she could call her Cristina, she had always been too busy in the books, or with Arnice. She had friends, she wasn't completely lonely, but after she started dating Arnice, they started to slowly fade and he become the consumer of more and more of her time. Maggie was her Cristina, she could after all, tell her aunt almost anything and Maggie was alway the first to know. Zola hadn't inherited her mother's dark, twisted personality, she was much more bubbly and optimistic just like Maggie in result of all the time they spent together.

" _I wanna be a brain surgeon just like my daddy."_ Zola recalls telling her the day her mother won her first Harper Avery, after having spent all day at the hospital shadowing her aunt.

Maggie was the first to know when Zola had even started her first period, got her first boyfriend, and first to know which colleges she applied to and which schools wanted her, not because her mother was a brilliant surgeon, but because she had applied and was not recruited. Don't get her wrong, she loved and appreciated it, but she wanted to get into a college because she worked hard, not just because her mother was an amazing surgeon. She wanted to earn what she worked for, not what was handed to her.

"Maggie," Zola flinches as the needle goes in, squeezing her eyes tightly and feeling as Maggie's hand had held more firmly to hers in response.

"We're almost done, Zola." Arizona reassures her. "It could be while before the labs come so do you two want a call when they come back, or would you rather wait here?"

Zola wanted her aunt to be there when she found out whether or not the pregnancy tests were truly accurate, after all, the blood test was the closest for sure thing next to an ultrasound. She wanted to confirm it and then set up an appointment with a doctor as soon as possible. Also she didn't want her mom to know.

Arizona looks at her phone, her face suddenly dropping with worry and looks to her intern, handing him the vile of blood and apologizing as she was preparing to leave in a hurry.

"Karev just paged me a 911 on Karen Randall's baby boy. I'm so sorry; I'll let you know as soon as anything comes back from the labs." Arizona then turns to her intern, giving him a set of instructions and he jots them down as quickly as she gives them.

"And I have another woman who came in earlier, so grab a resident when her results come back. Do you get that, Jameson?" She finishes, him nodding in understanding.

"Thanks Arizona." Maggie smiles as she brushes Zola's curls from her fearful face.

Zola nervously shakes her leg up and down, darting her shameful eyes away from her aunt's as she neglected to even try to make conversation. Maggie wanted so desperately to help her, but in the angsty teenage years where all she wanted to do is push others away, Maggie knew better not to push back too hard in fear that Zola would shut down all together.

"Hey," Maggie whispers with a reassuring smile, "I'm not going anywhere, no matter what happens or comes of this."

"How could I mess up this badly? Especially when both my aunts, my mom, and my grandmother were surgeons? This is like sex ed 101, and you think I'd know a little something about the human body!" Zola exclaims in frustration.

"Zo, us being surgeons had nothing to do with this. Because even as doctors we're human and not immune from mistakes, and so are you. You did one thing you regret, but you can't beat yourself up over it. It's how you take this mistake and learn from it that you'll grow and begin to forgive yourself."

Zola shakes her head through a face full of tears pouring down her face, making her feel sweaty, gross, and sticky, a human trainwreck. But she knew that even if Maggie didn't want to believe it, that everyone would judge her for this because of her background. They would shake their heads with their high expectations, mumbling how she should had known better, even her teachers.

She wanted a fresh start where she felt she was more than just the kid of Meredith Grey, because she knew she wouldn't be able to live it down at her own high school now. She wanted to move, she wanted to go to Boston, because that's where it seemed everyone in her family ran off to when things got bad. Maggie could see that she was thinking hard, that she did have the same tendency to run away like her mother had with Ellis.

"You are your own person, your family all being surgeons doesn't reflect on you, it just means everyone has the same expectations, and that really not fair. But I'm sure your sister and brother feel that way too."

"I want to move to Boston, go to that school for pregnant girls." Zola informs her firmly, her mind on a set track of how she wanted to go about this."

"We don't know anything yet, but when we do, then we'll worry about it. But I can't tell you whether you can or not. That's a conversation for you and your mother."

Zola hated hearing that; She wished that Maggie could make the decision for her because she didn't want to have to discuss it with her mom. She loved her mom, her mom was caring and driven and selfless. It reflected over into her parenting, but unlike patients who did dumb things that she had to help resolve, when she got home, Meredith had actual jurisdiction over the things her kids did, and had the right to tell them exactly what she was thinking and how to go about things. Ultimately, she had the upper hand.

Zola had thought the most embarrassing thing she had to go through was getting her first period, but aunt Maggie had made that slightly less cringy and turned it into a bonding experience. If only she could do the same thing now; Take something that felt shameful and made it new and fun and exciting. But she had felt hopeless and foolish. She felt like there was no coming back.

 _Zola woke up early in the morning, a sudden discomfort in her stomach and wet feeling between her legs. Upon pulling her pants and underwear down she had felt surprised at the blood stain that had formed and knew immediately that she had just received her right of passage into womanhood that her mother and aunts would often groan about. She felt sudden panic in her chest and her cheeks flush with embarrassment. No matter how many times they would tell her not to be ashamed because it was natural, it only made it worse._

" _Zo? What are you doing up? You don't have to be to school for another three hours!" Maggie sleepily brushes past Zo in the hall as she scrambles back to her room, pads and tampons tucked into the band of her underwear._

" _Shoot!" She exclaims as they fall out upon impact, and Maggie raises a sleepy brow, her confusion turning into a grin as she lightly chuckled._

 _Maggie helped gather Zola's things and hurried her back to her room, sitting next to the blushing and sheepish teen seated cross-legged beside her. Zola stared horrified and inquisitively at the tampons, too afraid to ask for help, but she knew that Maggie was there._

" _Zola, you have nothing to be embarrassed about, as cliche as that sounds. It's just our body's way of releasing the lining of our uterus, when you don't conceive a baby that month. The sole purpose of that lining is for if we get pregnant, then there's no need. But if…"_

" _Aunt Maggie!" She detests, begging her silently to stop the rambling. "I'm not planning on getting pregnant anytime soon! This feels so pointless." Zola sighs._

" _I know sweetie," Maggie brushes Zola's hair back, taking note of her rosy cheeks and decided she wanted to make this easier. "We don't understand why necessarily we need to have a cycle when we're not even looking for reproduction, but it's something that happens to every woman. The best we can do is accept that it means we're growing, and taking good care of our bodies while we do."_

" _Why can't God just send us a postcard that exclaims 'not pregnant!', on it?!" Zola half-heartedly laughs._

 _Maggie grabs her niece's hand, pulling her back into the bathroom and holding out a pad in one hand and a tampon in the other, offering it for her to choose._

" _Personally, I find it easier to start with pads your first time, until you get more comfortable with your body. It will never be all glittery, especially not on your period, but eventually you'll feel more confident about using them." Maggie suggests._

 _Maggie then lays out a pair of Zola's underwear, removing the pad from its wrapper and demonstrating how to put it on without removing the adhesive wrapper. She then hands it to Zola, watching the nervousness and horror on her face._

" _It takes practice to make it feel comfortable. But soon you'll see that maybe your brand was definitely not comfortable or convenient, and might decide to use tampons, and that's okay too. Or maybe you'll want the kind with wings, or overnight kind for heavier flow."_

 _Maggie stopped rambling when she noticed Zola had stopped taking in what she was saying. She laughed nervously and pulled determined Zola's eyes to meet hers._

" _Sweetheart, there's nothing to be ashamed of. You're a woman now! You should be proud! And also, if you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask them! And please, don't use the internet for goodness' sake, when you have three women right here!" She finishes before leaving Zola to do her thing._

 _Maggie closes the door behind her, startled when she runs into Meredith. Meredith tries to peer around Maggie who was guarding the door, hating to break Zola's trust already. She knew she couldn't keep it from Zola's mother, that wasn't her job as her aunt, but to help advise her and guide her as another mother figure when Mer couldn't be there._

" _Maggie, what's going on?" Meredith interrogates, suddenly interested._

" _Nothing; Zola was just cleaning the bathroom and didn't want to us to see until she was done. It's a surprise." She whispers the last part and Meredith raises a brow._

" _Zola's cleaning the bathroom? At six in the morning?" She sips her coffee, still glancing at Maggie above the rim of her coffee cup._

" _Yup. So I guess we should go back to bed so we can be surprised when she's finished."_

" _We have a shift that starts in two hours." Meredith reminds her. "Hopefully you'll have your act together by then?" She smarts off, before continuing down the hall to her bedroom._

 _She hears Zola on the other side of the door, unclicking the knob and peering out of the crack._

" _Well thanks for that, aunt Maggie. Now I gotta clean the bathroom so it didn't look like you lied to mom." She adds sarcastically to the conversation she had just witnessed._

" _Don't worry Sweetie, I think she already knows. Sorry." She grimaces, wincing at her poor attempt at lying._

"Ms. Shepherd?" Intern, Andrew Jameson suddenly knocks on the door before coming through, finding Maggie with Zola in her arms, tears running down their faces'.

Zola wipes the tears streaming from her eyes and nuzzles her head against the crease between Maggie's neck and shoulder, bracing herself for the results, not that she didn't have an intuition on how this was going. She could feel it in her body, the sore breasts, the nauseousness upon waking up, and the obvious sign of a missed cycle. It was all there in front of her, so when he began to speak, she only half listened.

"Your blood test came back and upon reading them, we can conclude that you are definitely, not pregnant." He announces and she suddenly shoots up, glaring from the surprised expression painted on her aunt's face, to the confusion in the interns.

"Not pregnant? As in, no baby, no parenthood, and definitely no school transfer? I'm not gonna lose my friends?" She suddenly becomes optimistic despite the initial first reaction that came off as nothing less than disappointed.

Maggie smiles, wrapping Zola into a hug as quick as she could before Zola jumped to her feet, thanking the intern while subconsciously planning how she would hide the bill later. But she knew Aunt Maggie would help her, already planning to tell Meredith it was a routine exam.

"Well Zozo, I hope you learned from this." Maggie chastens, preparing to leave to take Zola back to school.

"Congrats, ladies." Dr. Jameson smiles, shaking their hands before taking off.

Jameson heads down the hall, seeing Arizona from afar, speed walking in her OR scrubs and cap. He could see that she wore a distraught and sober expression and realized immediately that it couldn't be good news. Something had to have happened to the baby and he wanted to make her happy with the news that her friend and co-workers teenage daughter was in fact, not having a baby.

"Dr. Robbins," He addresses her, following her quickened pace down the hall with her.

"How's Zola Shepherd?" She asks, hopeful that at least one of her patients had been delivered good news.

"She's not pregnant!" He exclaims, hoping to share the joy with Arizona too.

Arizona stops at the front desk, grabbing labs and paperwork from one of the nurses, listening to the intern rave about how he delivered the news as she filled out the papers. He was boasting how he had delivered the labs by himself and successfully delivered news to all of her patients in the time that she was gone.

"Wait, Jameson. I gave you clear instructions on grabbing a resident to help you. You better have not been able to find one. Because otherwise if your intent was to so badly impress me by doing it on your own, you need an ego check for that overconfidence." Arizona firmly tells him.

"No Doctor Robbins; My intent was never that."

Arizona looks up exasperated with the barely three day old intern, taking the paperwork from his hands for documentation in the computers when she looked back to him in surprise.

"Was one of our patients, Amelia Shepherd?"

"No, Dr. Grey was taking care of her and asked me for help delivering things to the labs for her because she was paged. I told her I would since I was already on my way and she's my superior. Is there a problem, Dr. Robbins? Should I not help others when I'm not on their service?"

"No Jameson, it's not that! Of course you should help." She assures him, anger held in her voice.

"That's great. So what's the problem then?" He asks innocently, not picking up on the clear problem.

"Because Jameson, this is the other Shepherd! Amelia Shepherd! She must have been one of Meredith's patients! Did you know that?"

"No, but can you elaborate on how you've concluded this?" He pushes.

"You gave the test results to the wrong Shepherd! The paper clearly says ' _Shepherd, Amelia'_ on it!"

"They gave me the results for 'Shepherd', so I naturally assumed it was for Zola! I never realized that the ones I got were for Dr. Shepherd!" His eyes widened with understanding, fear in his hardened voice.

"Okay Andrew, let me tell you what you're going to do: You are going to apologize to this teenage Shepherd to whom you just gave false hope and tell her that she's pregnant and now her life just got a thousand times harder. And then you will go to Dr. Shepherd without disclosing the other patient and tell her you're sorry for screwing up your one job because you can't take clear instructions from your attending in charge."

Andrew froze, staring at Arizona in disbelief and fear, wishing that she could cover for his mistake. He knew this was a rookie mistake, he wished that he could have gone back and read the work despite not even thinking he would have to. He wanted to apologize profusely, work harder, make up for the fact he was now the intern responsible for messing up for not only a fellow, but also their niece. He would be known as the intern that couldn't follow simple directions that even a dog could have obeyed.

"Dr. Robbins, if I may…" He began before getting cut off.

"GO!" She snaps, turning her back to him.

"Crap." He mumbled under his breath, trudging back towards the exam rooms, secretly praying that both of them had already left.


	3. Tape and Glue Guy

**Chapter 3**

"So I'm pregnant? Impossible." Amelia had said without any emotion, already way past the stage of fear and more into numbness part.

She had lost her husband after he ran away to Germany in order to find Teddy, she was after all, his lifeline, not her. He hated the idea of being a dad this late in life when he had already accepted the fact that he was a cheater and Amelia in fact did not want children. They spent years working at a marriage despite believing that it wouldn't work, but they learned to compromise and work out their differences. However, their marriage worked best when they were together yet apart, and mostly just sex.

"Amelia, we'll get through this. But you need to talk to Owen first, tell him what's going on." Meredith consoles her, careful not to get too personal with the result before Amelia herself could accept what was coming. "But wait until the labs actually come back, okay?"

Amelia lays back on the exam table, waiting for actual confirmation that she was going to be a mother. And a terrible one, she might add. But Meredith felt optimistic for once in her life, that these could just be symptoms that were in her head as result of fear and anxiety. That this was just a misunderstanding.

"We won't know anything until we get your blood back." Meredith tries to reassure her.

It was then that an anxious Andrew Jameson rapped his knuckles on the wooden door three times, waiting for an answer before letting himself in to find Amelia with her arm thrown over her face, and Meredith with an extra blood vile sample in her hands, examining the label.

"Speak up, Jameson." Meredith demands, waiting impatiently with Amelia's hand now in hers.

"Dr. Grey, we're slammed today with patients, so I'm hoping you'll understand when I tell you that we've had some sort of mix up with your labs and another woman's." He begins, wringing his hands together.

"Well Jameson, who was it?" She demands again. "Is it one of my patients that you mixed up their charts?"

"Dr. Robbins says I can't disclose that information to you. You know that's patient confidentiality." He replies robotically with hesitance laced in his voice.

"Forget doctor Robbins!" She blatantly dismisses. "Stop acting like I can't handle bad news. My husband died in a crash, my mother had alzheimer's... do you want me to go on?"

"No, Dr. Grey. But I can assure you I'm very sorry..."

Jameson was interrupted by a series of groans from the women, rolling their eyes at the young intern. He chooses to ignore them, continuing his spiel.

"I've been a doctor for almost twenty years and can tell when someone is hiding something. Do you think I'm an idiot, Jameson?" She asks rhetorically.

"Meredith, that's not fair." Amelia jumps in, trying to calm her.

"Who is this woman that you don't want me to know of?" She pushes.

"Dr. Robbins is a professional and this was my mistake. I misread the paperwork. With all due respect, Dr. Grey, you're not on this case, so it's not really your concern..."

"Like heck it's not! Especially if it's one of my own. But discussing that here would be inappropriate and you know that, so who else is it?" She interrupts him, growing impatient with his carelessness.

The doctor in her felt terrible. If this had been her intern she would have been embarrassed and furious. She would have made him or her apologize for their mistakes and even though she knew that she herself wouldn't disclose it. But she was in the reverse position, and she could see that Amelia was just as concerned despite being so quiet during this argument.

"We've just mixed up the test results, but I can assure you that Dr. Shepherd is in fact, not pregnant and I'm here to tell you that in person." He tries to make the good outweigh the bad in order to distract her.

"That's impossible; Unless you labeled the viles wrong. But Arizona would never trust an intern to do that so that means the names. Are our names similar and you misread them?" Meredith draws to conclusion.

"Um, Doctor Grey. I think you really need to relax. You're not the OB here and we have it under control." he replies, trying to stay calm under interrogation.

"Jameson, are one of my daughters or my son here? And you don't want me to know? Because as their mom I'd like to know if someone is hurt and you have their labs!"

"Actually, can we talk in private, Dr. Grey?" He asks, suddenly calm.

"Answer me this Jameson: If this was any other patient you wouldn't be so hesitant, correct? You're lying, I can see that, Amelia can see it. So who is it?" Meredith rips the paperwork from his hands, her eyes feeling as if they were falling from their sockets as she read the name on the top, right corner: _Shepherd, Zola._

"Is this the one you misread?" She asks, suddenly confused.

"Dr. Grey, the labels weren't mixed. I simply just saw ' _Shepherd',_ and assumed they were hers."

"So you accidentally told my daughter she was pregnant, when she wasn't? All because you couldn't follow the simple procedures of delivering labs? And who gave you permission to do so anyways?" Meredith grows concerned, both as a mother and a doctor.

Andrew buried his head into his palms, preparing himself for the storm. The one where he would come in with bad news, stirring up the calm, then passing the damage onto her, were she would then spin out of control.

"Actually, the ones I read her were Amelia's from earlier. These are actually hers; She's pregnant." He finishes, darting his sorry eyes away from Meredith's and backing up, hand on the door handle. "I'm sorry." He adds with guilt, realizing how he had just stirred the family.

"Now what? You came here to give her Zola's labs as the easy way because you knew Meredith would talk to her daughter instead of you?" Amelia implies in disbelief. "Fasten your scrub cap, Bucko. Your not setting the scalpel down that easily." She laughs cynically.

"You should be fired Jameson, if this was any other of the interns or if it wasn't your third day!" Meredith angrily informs him, shoving the papers back into his chest.

"However, being a doctor doesn't mean you're exempt from making mistakes. And honestly you're lucky I'm a doctor and I've been in you place. Because if this was anyone else, your butt would be sued and thrown out of this hospital. This hospital might not even exist. So you caught a break, and I pray you learn from this, do you understand me?" She asserts, waiting for his frightened nod.

While Andrew grappled with the idea of Meredith hating him so much he would never get hours on her case, and the possibility of losing his job, Arizona scurried down the hall, hoping to catch Maggie before she left. Maggie was still on suspension but could still come as a patient, but she knew Maggie probably would want to be out of there as fast as possible out of embarrassment.

"Maggie?!" She cried out with relief, quickly flooded with fear in her voice that she desperately wanted to keep hidden. "Where's Zola?"

Maggie turned on her heels in search of the voice that had called her and pleasantly smiled when she had seen that it was Arizona.

"Hey! We got the labs and everything is looking up. Of course we're still gonna have the ' _talk'_ when we get home, but we'll have to wait for Meredith and I think Zola already has a pretty good idea what her mom's gonna say about this scare." Maggie laughs, her somber face replaced with a playful smile.

"Where's Zo? Did she go home?"

"Not yet, I was just gonna sneak up stairs to check on Mr. Peterson despite the suspension to make sure everything's okay. Zola is in the bathroom, hoping to hide from Mer." She slightly laughs.

"Maggie…" She begins.

Maggie was quick to realize that Arizona wasn't laughing or didn't find this amusing in the least bit, and her face quickly became somber. Had someone died? Was Amelia okay? She knew that Amelia was worried that she was pregnant but what if they had found something wrong with her or the baby? What if it was a benign tumor again?

"Arizona? What happened? Is it something with Amelia's results? Is she pregnant?" She quickly began to ramble, and Arizona held out one hand to silence her, her other palm on her forehead.

"Maggie, Amelia's results came back negative; She's not pregnant." Arizona begins.

"That's great! I mean, I was kinda rooting for another baby since we haven't seen one for years in our house, but that's good. I'm happy for her!" Maggie goes on and on.

Arizona turns towards the desk, thumbing through her paperwork before turning handing her a form. Maggie was so busy rambling on that she took it without a thought, beginning to thank Arizona for doing Zola's workup.

"Maggie! Listen!" Arizona grabs Maggie's hands in hers, keeping them from flailing. "But the test results that came back were mixed up and while Amelia was not actually pregnant, Zola was. Is, actually, I'm sorry!"

"W...what?! Zola's pregnant?" She stammers, stumbling upon her words as if she had been drinking. "But the results your intern read to us, said 'Shepherd', they were Amelia's?"

"Maggie, I'm so sorry. It's probably not what you wanted to hear and the intern, by the way, is already learning from his mistakes! I've got him doing postpartum hemorrhage checking."

"What do I tell her? She's sixteen! Do I start by telling her that her irresponsible actions resulted in foreseeable and obviously possible circumstances? That her life is now over because it's not just about her anymore?"

Maggie begins to pace, and Arizona sets a reassuring hand on her shoulder. Arizona felt horrible that this had to happen, and prayed to God that Sofia would never make the poor decisions that would lead her down this path. Being a teen was hard enough and so was being pregnant, but together the two were as she could compare, like taking antidepressants with alcohol: Depressing, stressful, anxiety provoking and dangerous.

"You don't get to make this call. The intern will tell her but ultimately she should be talking to her mother about it. Don't you think Meredith deserves to know?"

"Why is it that we spend all day delivering news to families, good and bad, but when it comes to our own family, it's so much harder?" Maggie sighs, her heart aching for not only Zola, but the other families who have been through a lot.

"Maggie, the best thing you can do right now is be with Zola when he tells her, and when she has to tell Meredith." Arizona reminds her softly, hand on Maggie's back.

Maggie wrung her hands together as she focused on calming herself, counting to the sound of her heels clicking on the linoleum in attempt to ground herself again. She eventually made her way back to the bathrooms on the peds floor, knocking on one of the stalls to the sound of Zola crying.

"Zo? It's me." Maggie gently calls before hearing the stall unlock and finding Zola in the corner, knees to chest.

"My life is over, Aunt Maggie." She gasps between heavy sobs.

Maggie sits beside her, brushing Zola's matted curls from her face and smiling. Zola somewhat resisted, moving her purse between the two as if it was some barrier. Zola was somewhat feverish to the touch, and her usually shiny cheeks were flushed.

"Do you guys just accept any medical students into your program? Is Grey-Sloan actually looking to teach and train, or just for the reputation as a teaching hospital. Because if so, your bar is set pretty low." Zola remarks, cracking a small smile.

"You heard? Great." Maggie puffs out her cheeks in frustration.

"Can you please tell your _pea- brained_ intern that it's technically illegal for him to follow me into a woman's restroom?"

"To be fair, he was only doing what he was told; And I can guarantee everyone in their lives has screwed up. His was mixing up the test results, but we're not gonna fire him, since we want him to learn. We could say the same thing for you, Miss Zola. Don't you think your deserve some kind of growing experience lesson from this little "whoops" ? Don't you think you deserve some leg room to grow from this? A second chance?"

Maggie asks her with concern on her face but hopefulness in her eyes that the teen would come to the realization that things happened, and this wasn't the end. She was trying to make a point for the teen to realize that this was normal, this was human growth. That one little mistake doesn't define people but it teaches them how to grow. It's how she'll respond and learn from this that will count.

"I'm so sorry aunt Maggie! This doesn't mean I'm a screw up, does it?" She asks, more for reassurance than as a question.

"Not at all, sweetheart. This means you're human." She promises, squeezing her niece into a hug. "Not to go without saying that I'm not disappointed, but I'm also hopeful for you and your future. To see what you do with your mistakes that will help shape your future. I wanna see you take this experience and run with it. Use it to help others, not just yourself."

"Does this mean I still have to tell mom?" She smiles nervously, slight humor in her voice.

"I think it would be unfair not to. Not for yourself but for her too. She loves you Zola and will only want to help your once she's past the shock and anger and denial. She's a very strong woman and I see her in you everyday."

"I'm scared, Aunt Maggie." She whimpers.

"I know, but if you're half the woman your mom is, you'll be okay. Promise." Maggie smiles, holding out her pinky finger.


	4. Who tells their story pt 1

Hey guys! Thank you for the kind reviews and suggestions! I appreciate your feedback because I see it as a connection between writer and reader that helps bring feedback to improve the story and create something that the reader can enjoy and feel a part of. My favorite part of reading is when I feel connected tot he characters! Anyways, I would never write Meredith's reaction as disowning Zola because it's completely out of character, however, you'll see how Meredith and the twisted sisters handle it! And I'm working on establishing a relationship with her and her daughter. Because during teenage years it's typically for mother and daughters to have a certain distance, and I wanna close that gap between Meredith and Zola in this chapter, so you don't get the idea that she doesn't have a relationship with her mom! Anyways, I will be busy writing the next fees days and working, so I'm gonna try to change my idea and publish new chapters on Fridays! Don't worry, there will be more, see you Friday! Here's a short chapter to fill you in!

 **Chapter 4**

"Am I the only one that doesn't hear things until the moment comes around in this house?!" Meredith asks in exasperated, flailing her hands around in frustration.

Zola tucks herself deeper into the couch cushions, watching her mother frantically pace the living room in front of the coffee table, and looks to her aunts for help. Maggie smiles reassuringly for moral support, but she knew even as her aunt and her confident, this should be something she should be telling her mother, from her point of view, not her aunt.

Zola had always confided in Maggie, since little on, from deciding early on that she wanted to be like her daddy to deciding on colleges. But Maggie knew that she was not Zola's mother and if she was in Meredith's position, she'd be hurt to know that her daughter was afraid to open up to her. She'd sit down with her kid and try to open a more comforting line of communication. She was happy to help Zola, but she was not her mother, and she wanted Zola to be less afraid.

Meredith was a doctor; If her patients didn't tell the truth it would make it harder to treat them or diagnose them and it couldn't even lead to fatal errors. Though Zola's "condition" wasn't fatal, it would be easier for everyone once she opened up. Maggie wanted Zola to have a relationship with her mom.

After all, Meredith was wise beyond her years and once past the initial shock would be more than willing to help. She would never turn a patient away, so when it came to her own daughter, she'd do the same, if not more for her or any of her children. So Maggie encouraged a reluctant Zola to talk to her mom.

She was the one who could really help and she didn't want to interfere. Though they were all her number one support system, she knew the importance of Zola talking to her mother. She was only the aunt, after all. Zola needed her mother, and Maggie knew exactly where her place was and which lines she should not cross as an aunt.

"Well, what do you have to say for yourself, Zola?" She demands, waiting for her to speak up and explain.

"Mom, I'm really, really sorry." Zola began, unsure where else to start and watches as her mother's face softens.

"Well that's a start. But Zo, it doesn't change the fact that you're pregnant! Or that you went behind my back to go to Arizona's office. Do you think that was fair to make her or your aunt Maggie keep that secret from me?"

"No mom." She shamefully agrees, trying not to raise her voice as her mother was trying to do also. "It was stupid, just an act out of pure thoughtlessness of the consequences. He told me I'm beautiful, stroked my hair as he began to…" She begins.

"No sweetie, not that." Amelia warns, trying to be helpful but Meredith shoots her a look of disapproval before she shuts up, wondering if she should even be there.

"Mom, I understand that is was stupid. If you wanna throw me out or disown me like they do in every other one of those tv dramas, or if you want to accept it, that's up to you. But I know what I did was wrong, I understand that. I just want you to love me, no matter what choices I make."

Zola plead repeatedly, trying to throw in lighthearted humor that poked fun at tv shows where the mother would become livid and immediately throw their kid out, without a chance to explain. Zola found comfort in knowing that even though she believed her mother would never do that, it was still not going to be a walk in the park. Her mom's been through a lot, and this was just another unfair disappointment she didn't deserve.

Meredith's face softens, seeing the actual guilt and hurt on Zola's face, causing her heart to ache for the young girl more than she had intended. After all, she was still her mother at the end of the day and tomorrow, and she would never let anything change how she felt for her kids. She was their biggest advocate, but at some point they had to be their own advocate, learn independence and self discipline from mistakes. Everyone screws up, but somethings can be avoided.

"I'm your mom; There's nothing big or small you could do to make me love you any less and I would cross burning bridges for all my children, no matter how stupid the decision. The thing that matters most to me is that you are who I raised you to be. Someone who is true to themselves, and kind to others, puts them first."

Meredith sits on the end table, looking her tearful and sheepish daughter in the eyes firmly, and though she looked and sounded extremely disappointed, there was a certain comfort and sadness in her mom's eyes. Meredith grabbed Zola's hands, her creases at the edge of her mouth slightly smiling.

"Zola, as disappointed as I am in you, I will always love you. You shouldn't feel like you have to hide things from me. And it's okay to confide in Maggie and Amelia, but I'd rather you come to me with things first instead of hiding them."

Meredith sighs, brushing Zola's hair from her face and saw the shame and worry in her face, but ultimately relief that Meredith wasn't screaming, wasn't denying her as her own, or throwing her out and disowning her. After all, her mom was a doctor so she felt as if she had to be the perfect little child. She felt like she had done her mother dirty, making her mom look like she doesn't know how to take care of her own kids or teach them the basics about human anatomy and sex.

"Ultimately they can't make the decisions for you. You were given choices, and you chose the wrong ones. We can't help you go back and change that. But we can be here as you move forward and take this one mistake and make it into a lesson."

"I'm sorry mom. I've made you look bad. Not only to your fellows, but as a doctor. I've disappointed you."

"Maggie and I are doctors too , you know." Amelia slurs, wine thick on her lips.

"Do I need to kick you out? You're not helping!" Meredith warns Amelia, irritated with her unwanted banter and comments when she had been drinking.

Amalia was basically unnecessary to the conversation and irrelevant, hard to take seriously when she was on her third glass. Meredith chose to ignore the rest of her talking and turned back to her distraught daughter, fearfully wringing her hands together on the couch, as her arms held a couch cushion to her stomach.

"Zola, I couldn't care less what this makes me look like as a doctor or what others will think. Being a doctor doesn't exempt you from being human and making mistakes. This is not a reflection on our characters or me as a parent. The only thing that matters is how we react to it, how we move on and learn from it. That's all I want aside from your well being."

Zola feels relief flood over her as Meredith reaches out to hug her rigged daughter, shaking from the bones out, goosebump apparent on her arms, complimented by heavy breathing. Zola's tense body slowly sunk into her mother's as she relaxed, the tension no longer thick enough to cut with a knife. Meredith eventually pulls away, first whispering an ' _I love you'_ in her ear.

"Now, you have adult decisions to make; Do you know your options?" Meredith slightly chastens her, taking away from the bittersweet moment to become more serious again.

"Well, adoption is a beautiful thing. I want to find my baby a mother that's as wonderful and you and dad have been. As open minded and welcoming, selfless even. Someone who knows that family is more than just blood. And is willing to sacrifice as much as you, dad and the aunts have for us these past several years."

Zola's heart feels as if it was going to burst, more than just nervousness and shakiness in her voice, but the happy rythme that reassured her that everything was going to be okay and brought comfort.

"I couldn't agree more." Maggie piped in, taking another sip from her wine glass.

"We love you Zo, and couldn't be more proud of who you've become, despite this one thing." Amelia pitches in, greatful that even if she couldn't have a child herself, that Zola could be a darn good mother in her place.

"Yeah, a mother's love is limitless and unconditional." Maggie added, trying to be more helpful than Amelia had been.

"One more thing before we let you go," Meredith finally adds, seriousness painted all over her face. "Even though you're forgiven, it doesn't mean you're getting off so easy. You're still for certain grounded."

"Moooom..." Zola groans before realizing how lucky she was getting off. "How long?"

"For 'til college." She blatantly dismisses, as if she didn't even need to think about it. That being said, you will be riding the bus to school the rest of the year. Your curfew will be eight on school nights, and nine on weekends for the rest of the school year as well."

"Can't we have an except for "good behavior" or something?" She attempts to joke lightheartedly.

"Zo, this isn't the time for jokes. Your mom is being more than fair." Amelia warns, and Meredith nods, despite the fact that it was more "drunk" Amelia speaking.

"Please mom, the bus when I'm extremely pregnant? By the end of the year I'll be over eight months pregnant!" Zola pleas.

"Right. You should've of thought of that before you decided to have sex… at all." Meredith chastens before yawning. "Get your butt upstairs and brush your teeth, it's time for bed." Meredith demands, watching as Zola obediently scurries up the stairs gratefully before Meredith changed her mind.

"Boy, did Derek get a lucky break on having to deal with that! That was waaay too much and unexpected for even the twisted sisters to handle, but we did it." Amelia smiles lopsidedly, only to be shot a look of disapproval and shock from the other two.


	5. And I was like Baby!

Meredith took off for Zola's eight week appointment, but unfortunately would be late because of an emergency that had sprung up. It had been a relatively slow day but nonetheless it was the ER, so of course anything was possible. Maggie was at a board meeting over the status of her job after punching a fellow, and Amelia had the day off, so she would pick up Zola from school and bring her over.

"Are you nervous? This is exciting!" Amelia tries to cheer her up in order to break the tense silence. "Dr. Robbins is great and even though this whole thing was unplanned and scary, Arizona will make sure to have yours and the baby's back through the entire pregnancy. In and out." She turns the corner, Zola's head lightly bumping against the window.

"It's easy for you to say; Your pregnancy scare didn't come until you were old and established in your career." Zola retorts, not having it.

"Zola, for the record, I am not old! Medical school, internship, and residency puts wear and tear on oneself, and I had to work for what I wanted. I can assure you that it didn't come without obstacles so I prefer that you say I "Aged and matured in my practice with grace", in order to become the doctor I have become. And I'm darn proud of what I've accomplished!"

Zola huffed out an annoyed breath, just a cover from her actual anxious insides, so that Amelia wouldn't lecture her more or try to reassure her that it was going to be okay. She was tired of that cliche that it was all going to be okay, that all her family had made it through ups and downs of medical school and everything in between and they turned out fine. The only difference was, they weren't sixteen.

"Aunt Amy, I'm tired of these cliches! You didn't have it easy, we know that. But you're at a point in your life where you can afford a child, mentally, financially, and so on! I have a whole other life to see!"

"Are you saying I'm just welting away and I don't have much left to see?" Amelia implies with amusement.

"I'm saying that our circumstances were, or are, different."

Amelia tapped her fingers on the wheel of her car, watching as the light turned red and the sound of the cars behind her honking filled the silence. It was rush hour directly after school and she feared they would be late to their appointment.

' _Please God, don't let this little girl suffer more than she already feels she is! Don't let her go through the same experiences I have and create her her own.'_ Amelia prays in her head, watching out her peripheral vision as Zola tugs at her curls as she often did when she was nervous or thinking.

Even though Zola was nervous, she also carried a certain curiosity everywhere she went about the things she would encounter and the adventures on which she would embark. Would she hear the heartbeat and instantly fall in love, would seeing the baby change her deadset mind from adoption to raising the baby herself? What if the baby had a deformity that they could only see through testing and they missed it because Zola would be too afraid to do so?

Zola knew that her child having a disability or deformity wouldn't change how she felt towards this pregnancy and the adoption. She would love this child whether she raised it or not, whether he or she was handicapped or fully able-bodied, or even mental disabled. It didn't make a difference in this world who this child would be as long as he or she turned into a person that she could always be proud of, as long as they were who she or the adoptive parents raised them to be.

She knew deep down she wanted to be so picky so that she could stall the thoughts of adoption even though initially it was what she wanted. She knew it was the best, least selfish choice and yet a small part of her wanted to get to know this baby. Who he or she would be, what their interests were, watch as they grew and self discovered. But with an open adoption, she knew she could still get some of that, even if it wasn't on a day to day, contact to contact basis.

"How are you feeling, Zo? Are you ready?" Amelia snaps her out of her daydream, beginning to climb out of the car.

Zola pictured her son, laughing as he threw food all over himself and his eating tray, or as he dug dirt out of the ground in the backyard, eating it to Zola's dismay. She pictured having to dig worms out of his mouth, having to kiss his bruises and cuts from tripping over his clumsy, unbalanced feet on the sidewalk as a toddler.

Or she pictured a daughter, doing her hair right, combing through the thick, coarse curls as her parents did to her growing up. She also pictured her daughter clumsily falling on the sidewalk or eating dirt and sand. She pictured her daughter with dolls, or maybe she would be tomboyish and prefer to run around with uncle Bailey and his football. Either way, either gender, she would love.

"What if it's just an ectopic pregnancy like aunt Cristina? Or what if the baby has complications like Jackson and April's son? Or what if I'm just completely infertile like Jo and Alex and have to adopt three of my own children?" Zola suddenly rambles.

"Well first off, we know you're not infertile." Amelia laughs.

"Second, blood doesn't equal family as we have told you growing up, and I'm sure your adoptive parents will feel the same if your baby is ill. Even if the baby had a disability, do you think that would change any kind soul in their right mind from adopting if they had been praying for a baby so long and finally got a call? Believe it or not Zo, there are still good people out there looking for a child to love. They don't care about the baggage or the challenges they'll face."

"As horrible as it sounds, I've been kind of hoping it was an ectopic pregnancy so I wouldn't have to worry about it. Or that the test was wrong or things. It makes me feel horrible, but I can't imagine actually being pregnant of my life a year from now even."

"Ectopic pregnancies can be dangerous Zo. And as far as the future goes, you just gotta trust that God has a path paved for you that's gonna take you where you're supposed to be, a year from now, ten years, and so on." Amelia reaches over the console, squeezing Zola's hand."

They check in and Zola gets undressed, pulling the itchy and battered gown over herself and tying the back closed, feeling slightly undisposed. She hated the feeling of the breeziness, and felt as if her body was on display for the whole floor to see.

"Remember Betty and Leo?" Amelia asked out of nowhere. "She overcame so much and turned her life around, so don't ever feel like you can't. I've overcome an addiction, Betty's getting help. And the thing we had in common was that we both asked for help. It took a while for it to happen, but we wouldn't be where we are now if we had tried to do it on our own. You're not alone, Zo." Amelia smiled reassuringly.

They heard a brief knock on the door and jumped, a frantic Meredith walking in, her face saddened and anxious all at the same time. She had watched Mr. Matthews die today so she hoped that at least this appointment would bring her some joy, despite the fact that the ultrasound was for her sixteen year old daughter.

"Thanks for waiting with her, Amelia." Meredith huffs, out of breath from flying through the hospital just to make it to this floor on time. "So are we gonna do this thing, or what? I've been dying to see something happy after this crap-shoot of a day."

Zola had felt shame and embarrassment, not because she came from a family where disfunction was the normal, and dark and twisty was expected, but because she had caused an unacceptable amount of stress, not that any stress was acceptable. She wanted nothing more than to have a relationship with her mother. She didn't want to be "Meredith and Ellis".

And Meredith sure did a good job of not putting her job ahead of the needs of her children, making them her priority and seeing to it that they felt loved and that work wasn't the most important thing. She didn't want to be absent, though she was passionate for her job, and knew when things did get crazy, she wasn't alone. She, Amelia and Maggie were doing a good job.

She wouldn't call it a "bang up" job. Her kids were respectful and obedient, not like robots, but they had their moments like every other child, and when the time came, Meredith disciplined. She tried to never belittle her children, but assigned proper punishment according to the crime so that they would learn from their mistakes and grow. She believed in learning and growth, because just as a surgeon, if you don't make mistakes, you can't learn because there would be nothing to learn from.

"Good morning!" Arizona chirps as she walks in the room, all heads turning towards her.

"Are we ready to see the baby today, ladies?" She pulls on a pair of gloves as Zola hesitantly lifts her shirt to reveal her stomach.

Amelia, Maggie, and Meredith all crowd around her, watching as Arizona began to set up to search for the baby and its heartbeat. Zola could barely focus as she was more concerned with the cold jelly that was being lathered on her abdomen, and her three aunts hovering over her. She loved them but felt suddenly uncomfortable with the attention she was receiving.

"Um, before we begin," Zola looked around to the smiling faces above her, "Would it be okay if just my mom was here. I'd really like it just to be a moment for her and I." Zola sheepishly asked, watching as their faces' changed to surprise.

"Sure, Sweetie." Amelia smiled, kissing her atop the head and heading towards the door as Maggie squeezed Zola's hand goodbye.

Zola smiled nervously up at her mom and Meredith grabbed her hand, the bittersweet moment interrupted by the loud thud of the baby's heartbeat filling the room as the transducer swooped around her abdomen. The heartbeat continued to slowly fade and then get louder again as she moved back and forth across her stomach.

"That's it? That's the baby?" Zola was surprised by the strong sound, especially since she hadn't expected it so suddenly.

She read in all her pregnancy research before her appointment that she probably wouldn't hear it, but she was still anxious. Meredith could obviously sense it because of mother's intuition, or maybe it was the fact that Zola's hand had tightened around hers.

"Would you like a picture of your _little human_?" Arizona smiled, these moments which were her favorite; The first appointment, hearing the heartbeat, and the joy on even the youngest of moms faces'.

"He or She looks so weird; Like a worm." Zola slightly coos unintentionally, realizing that it was going to be harder than she thought to pretend that this wasn't going to change her life.

"I'd say you're about nine weeks along." Arizona informs her, printing the image.

Arizona handed them the ultrasound, Zola's hands shaking around the image as she stared and saw her 'bean' like baby, curled into a worm like shape in the picture. As Arizona left to grab any paperwork, she closed the door behind her and Zola sighed, relieved.

"I'm proud of you Zo, even after all this. You're real mature." Meredith smiles, brushing her hair back and Zola frowns, furrowing her brows.

"How can you say that? I'm doing this because I'd make a terrible mom if I kept the baby, and feel like a terrible person if I aborted the baby, especially after hearing the heartbeat."

"Zola, you're not a terrible person. You knew going into this it wasn't going to be easy and I'd say you're doing great. Your motives are selfless, choosing this child over yourself, choosing to put their life before yours. It isn't just your body anymore Zo, you've got another little human in there that you're giving your body to for the next several months." Meredith tries to reassure her, but Zola turns her body, reaching for a box of tissues.

She wipes the gel off and tossing her tissue into the trash, feeling tears pool in her eyes that she definitely didn't want her mother to see. But Meredith could see she was upset and backed off a bit, giving her daughter a chance to say what she truly was feeling. Overwhelmed. Anxious. Scared. All of the above.

"Mom, can I confess something to you? Something that makes me feel like a horrible person, but I've just got to say it because I'm so tired of hearing that I'm brave. Because I know it's not true. That this doesn't make me brave."

"Pregnancy is difficult; I nearly died having your brother and sister. But you're not just brave for continuing through with this, but the fact that you're accepting your poor choices and taking on your challenges head on. That's brave, and shows real growth, Zola. Your father would be proud. You know, after the initial heart attack." Meredith lightheartedly smiles.

"Please mom, don't bring dad into this! And the only thing that will come of this whole thing is that the baby will find a forever home and I'll try to act like nothing happened but how can I do that when I can barely keep myself together."

"No one is expecting you to keep it together. You're not supposed to be perfect, you're supposed to be learning. And you facing this will have its ups and downs, it's not smooth sailing. But you've got me behind you, and your aunts and siblings. And true friends will be behind you, supporting your decisions and not offering unsolicited advice. They'll be there to listen, as will we." Meredith reassures her, wiping a tear from her daughter's face while trying to hold back hers.

Meredith's baby girl, the one she fought so hard for years ago, was still to her someone worth fighting for, whether it had been her adoption, or now, an unplanned teenage pregnancy. She loved Zola more than words themselves could explain, and she would go to the depths anywhere to help her children, show that they're not alone. Of course she didn't baby them, but after all, she was still their mother. She showed that she was listening, compassion, understanding.

"Mom? One more terrible thing." Zola confesses.

"Which would be what? Anything, Zo." Meredith encourages. "Is it Aunt Maggie? Because she hovers too much and if you'd like me to say something since you two are pretty close," Meredith begins to anticipate, only to be interrupted by Zola.

"When we were getting ready to come here today, part of me was hoping they wouldn't find anything. Like, I wasn't hoping the baby died, but just that small part of me was hoping that they were wrong about me being pregnant at all. Hearing the heartbeat was just gonna make it feel real, and I just didn't feel ready for that." Zola wipes the rolling tears from her eyes, her cheeks reddening.

"It's completely normal to be hopeful when things are hard to accept. It's your mind protecting itself. But a lot is going to change and we can't stop it, no matter how much we hope. You'll never be fully prepared for what's to come, and I'd be concerned if you stress yourself over trying to be perfect. Don't worry Sweetheart, everything will workout in time."

"I feel terrible for even hoping such a thing. Because after seeing the heartbeat, everything became more real, and I felt something in my heart. It didn't change my mind about the adoption, but made me even more motivated to do everything I can to give this baby what it deserves."

"I'd be concerned if you weren't worried. Worrying about the adoption shows that you do care. If you were a heartless person, do you really think you'd be looking so hard to do what's right for everyone?"

"I've made such a dumb mistake."

Zola bit her lip, feeling the sting of sharp tears leaving her eyes only to find herself sobbing and heaving helplessly. But wasn't she helpless after all? No, she had to own up to her mistake. This situation was not at all helpless. She chose to have sex, she chose to take responsibility, and show a new sense of maturity.

"This is a scary situation to be faced with and again, if you were completely pretending this wasn't happening, I'd be more concerned. But you're recognizing your mistakes, and surely It's scary to see the consequences and to wish they weren't there. But wishing them away isn't gonna make it happen your way, remember?"

Meredith brushes through Zola's curls, pushing away the matted curls as she felt that she couldn't get the point across enough that Zola shouldn't beat herself up on her mistakes but grow. She's told Zola a million times growing up that mistakes were how she learned and got to where she was in life, and that there would be more to come. She'd deal with them as they came. But she wanted Zola to learn that it was normal, and that she had lots more coming. She wanted nothing but the best for her kids.

"What's important here is growth. How you take the situation and learn from it, how you grow as a person and reflect on it. Not constantly looking back on what you did wrong, but how you've moved on." Meredith reiterated.

Zola slightly smiled up at her mother with understanding, sitting up and pulling Meredith into a surprise hug. It had been so long since they had had any deep conversation, and honestly it felt like a breath of fresh air. She had been swimming along the tide so long, hiding under the waves, and when she finally came up for air her mother was there to help pull her out of the storm.

"I love you, mom." Zola whispers.

"Thank-you ZoZo; As your mother I love to hear it because it reassures me that even as a teen, you don't completely hate me. And so we're clear, I love you, and nothing will change that. No matter how stupid the mistake."

Meredith was standing at the shore, pulling her fearful daughter from the currents and wild tides of the ocean, bringing her to solid ground. She was there the entire time, waiting with her safety floaties, and Zola finally grabbed on, trusting that she would be safe in her mother's hold.


	6. Hit me one more time!

"Good morning- woah!" Maggie walks past the bathroom, pausing to find a ghostly pale Zola hovering near the toilet.

"Mom warned me about this," Zola begins as she swipes her hand across her mouth, dripping in vomit, "But I hadn't expected my nausea to escalate into this. Especially since I'm almost three months along." She groans, lunging for the toilet again.

Maggie swoops in, gathering Zola's hair in one hand and rubbing her back with the other, remembering how she would try and comfort the kids when they were sick and little. She would be there while they puked, help them back to bed, and return with a damp washcloth, some water and crackers.

But with morning sickness it was a whole different story. She knew this wasn't just an upset stomach but an overwhelming surge of hormones, and she hadn't expected Zola to so suddenly be slammed with it, especially since it had been pretty smooth sailing with the nausea that would usually subside mid-day.

"Darn me, for trusting in your overly optimistic ways." She tries to lightheartedly joke, but Maggie could hear in her voice some resentment towards her.

She could tell that Zola was slightly angry and irritated, but blamed it on the fact that she had been up since four vomiting, and had a big test today. She didn't truly believe Maggie was to blame, she just needed to blame someone. It was "pregnancy anger", Meredith called it when Zola had first snapped, trying not to take it to heart.

"Your mother always says that I'm full of sunshine and rainbows." She laughs.

"You know what else you guys are full of?" Zola spat.

"Okay…. Let's get you cleaned up and ready for the day." Maggie helps her stand when she was positive Zola was done.

Zola sulked as she stood, wishing that she could stay home from school but knew that wasn't a possibility. She felt like everyone expected a doctor's kid to be a straight 'A' student, and she swear she didn't even have a chance to breathe between school and home because she was busy trying to keep up with everyone else's expectations and standards. It was exhausting, but the sooner she began to realize it wasn't true, the better. She decided to let go, and gave the day off thing one more try.

"Actually, I was thinking I'd stay home today." Zola informs Maggie as they walk down the hall towards her room.

"I think that with a baby on the way, work and school should be your priorities. You can't hide and shut down because life got a little tough. There are no "days off" in the real world, and you can't let a little morning sickness, or the opinions of others keep you down."

Maggie pulls Zola into a hug, feeling her rugged breathing as she tries to hold back the tears of exhaustion, and fear, and everything else.

"It's not gonna be easy Sweetie, nothing is. But if you are who your mother raised you to be, you're going to be okay. We've got you, and we're willing to bend over backwards to make sure you get all the help you'll need. But you'll also need to learn to fight for yourself. To find who you really are, and it's not gonna happen overnight."

Maggie lets go, looking at her watch and realizing that she was going to be late for her final hearing with Bailey and the hospital board. She was going to sit across from Owen, mentally preparing for what her future would hold after any decisions were made. But she knew he wouldn't show, that she wouldn't even have to make a case because he was across the world with Teddy, leaving her off the hook. The fact that they even had to discuss was beyond her, but it was protocol.

"Now I have my final meeting to go to, and my job may be on the line, so Aunt Amelia is making breakfast and will take you to school." Maggie informs her briefly before scurrying down the hall to her bedroom.

"Amelia's making breakfast?" Zola repeats to herself.

"Crazy, I know. Don't eat the pancakes, just politely feed them to the dog, because she's hung over." Meredith jokes as she passes Zola down the hall, briefly kissing her on the head before heading down the staircase.

She watches as Amelia flips a pancake in the pan, watching it bubble up as it cooks through, though it smelled as though she was burning it instead. Amelia gags, pinching her nose at the foul smell of the batter burning to the pan.

"You have to grease the pan first, then watch to make sure they don't burn." Meredith informs her.

"I know how to make pancakes, Mer." She sassily reassures her, gesturing around with the spatula, clearly flustered.

"You also know how to clip an aneurysm, doesn't make you an expert." Meredith retorts before grabbing the spatula from her and removing her from the hot stove.

Amelia sits down at the table, head in her hands as she groans. Her head was pounding and she thought that cooking breakfast and having something in her system could help take her mind off of the hangover.

"Okay, what's been going on with you?" Meredith spat.

"Huh? N...nothing. Why would you say that?" Amelia nervously laughs.

"Is this about not being pregnant? About Owen? Are there other things in your life I don't know about? You're not on drugs again, are you?" Meredith worries.

"Of course not!" Amelia quickly assures her, trying to focus on something else: Her work.

Amelia begins to scatter the brain scans of an eight month old baby who was born with only three-fourths of her brain. It was a God given miracle the baby had lived as long as she did, but now she had an inoperable tumor on the part of the brain she did have. It was tricky and it was sad, but mostly it was triggering. Between losing her baby all those years ago, she felt herself pressured into working hard to save little Ivy. Not only pressure on herself, but from the parents.

"How the he-" Amelia begins to mutter before she's given a look from Meredith.

"Whatever is bothering, you need to figure it out! Because the kids are beginning to feel it too. This drinking, it needs to stop."

"I'm having a glass or two of wine on the weekends; I'm not now who I used to be then." Amelia brushes off.

"Amelia, that's how it escalates. You're stressing over things and you unwind with a drink and before you know it, you'll stumble with your work. You have patients that are depending on you, putting their lives into your hands, and if you don't cut this out, you'll be hurting people, only making them worse."

"I operated on Nicole Hermann with a brain tumor, I can operate with a hangover." Amelia tries to unconvincingly reassure her.

"That's just the problem! The drinking. It impairs your judgement, makes you tired! The only difference is you couldn't control the tumor and you didn't know you had one at the time! This is in your hands, Amelia! Your patients, your job! It's up to you!"

Meredith reaches across the table, snatching the wine from the center and stuffing it into her purse, mentally reminding herself to throw it away before getting to work. She didn't need a lawsuit over malpractice, or being accused of drinking on the job. Maggie and Amelia were already in enough trouble, they didn't need all three of them to be jobless.

"I hope you know how selfish you're being." Meredith snarkily remarks. "Figure it out; And keep it away from my kids!" Meredith shouts over her shoulder as she exits the house.

Amelia's mind couldn't stop circling back through the whole conversation, analyzing every word. How she had operated with a tumor, which she felt would've been one hundred times harder than a hangover, but nonetheless dangerous. So she called into the hospital, requesting that Deluca take over her service. Then she grabbed her phone, dialing up the number of an old friend, a favor in mind.

" _I mean, I'm a brain surgeon with a brain tumor; C'mon, it's kind of funny." She laughed, trying to get Deluca to laugh with her in the irony as they looked at the scans._

She tapped her fingers anxiously, scooting the scans in together with her other as she listened to her phone ring, holding it between her ear and shoulder. The line clicked, and her friend picked up.

"Hey, I don't know what time it is there, so sorry if I woke you." She greets apologetically.

" _It's okay. What's up, Dr. Shepherd?" The recipient replies._

"I have a proposal based on something seen on your facebook page. You in?"

" _Depends."_ She replies.

"I just so happen to be a part of the board that grants the neuro research fund every year, and I'll put in a word for you if you help me. Sound like a deal?" Amelia chews her fingernail.

" _Well Dr. Shepherd, let's see what you got." She smiles from the other end._

 **-XXX-**

As Zola ended her first trimester and her first horrible obstacles of pregnancy were seeming that they were nearing their end, she found that pregnancy was not the only thing that would become increasingly difficult. She pondered the idea of transferring schools once the word was out, which she figured would be soon because her "sperm donor daddy" of an ex had a large mouth. The only thing Zola could rely on was him not saying anything because his big ego made it difficult for him to ever do anything wrong.

He would belittle her, tell her how lucky _she_ was to have him, tell her friends how difficult _she_ could be. He would even brag that he brought helped keep her A average up in order to help protect her precious "surgeon's child" reputation. She knew all the hard work was her, but he didn't want to seem superior to a woman. He was a sexist, egotistical, pig.

" _Mommy? Why did Aunt Maggie stop having S-E-X with Deluca?" Zola had asked with curiosity in her eyes of why they had been spelling._

" _Because he couldn't handle that she was his B-O-S-S. Never Date a man that can't handle your P-O-W-E-R." She replied, smiling._

 _Zola nodded in understanding before scurrying off with her siblings, and though it wasn't a big deal and she didn't really understand what Meredith had meant at the time, but eventually she knew that the strongest women in her life would be right: She didn't need a man to be powerful, or to feel beautiful, or even be successful._

Zola had known all her life that she wanted to be an independent woman, the breadwinner of the house because she didn't need to rely on a man, much like her mother took care of herself and the kids when her dad died. But that wasn't true at all; Meredith had raised the kids with the help of Alex, Amelia, and Maggie, this wasn't a solo act.

But when she had met her ex boyfriend Arnice, her tough exterior would slowly be eaten away as he belittled her in front of his and her friends. She began to shut out her friends when they had warned her about him, and slowly became more dependent on him simply because he made her believe she couldn't be something without him, and she was nothing to her friends. He was manipulative, controlling, but it all flew out the window to reveal his frail inner shell when she revealed to him she was pregnant.

" _No you're not; That's not funny." He spat, looking down at Zola who had chosen to continue looking at her feet._

" _Babe, you can't fake this kind of thing. Look." She hands him the test from her pocket that read 'pregnant', on it, clear letters._

" _That's not yours. It's your friends and you are using it to break up with me. Because you know I'd never stay with a worthless, trashy, black girl like you if that's the case." He continued to ramble informatively._

 _Zola's heart broke, the first real flood of emotions washing over her that she had felt in months, because up until then, she was blind and emotionally numb towards everything, and like a good little robot, she would cower in fear and listen to his every want._

" _My mother is white, you jerk! And she raised us to be respectful and open to everyone no matter the color, or origin. For you to assume I'm street trash because of my race just proves how small of a mind you actually have. Because if you truly believed in anything good, you'd see that you haven't been helping me! You would have seen that sex would have gotten us in this situation, and you for sure wouldn't have pressured me to have it with you!" She screamed, her face boiling in blood red._

 _He grabbed her wrists, anger glaring in his hazel eyes, and his lip quivered. He knew she was right and didn't think she would have been smart enough to catch on, because up until then she had followed him around like a lost little dog, cowering and obeying to his every need._

" _I don't need you to get what I want; I've been nothing but kind to you! Offered you to sleep with me because you know darn well no one else would want to!" He paused and looked at her in disgust before adding more. "Why didn't you make me wear a condom!" He projects it onto her._

 _Zola's heart wrenched but she was the true him. She knew that no one who had worked as hard as she did deserved to be talked down to like she was. She didn't deserve someone who couldn't own up to the consequences of his actions, but only could think of what he wanted in the moment, without thinking of anyone else's troubles too. He pressured Zola into sleeping with him so that he wouldn't feel depressed, and warned her if she hadn't, that he would show her she made a mistake. Whatever that meant, but she didn't want to know._

The school bell rang in dismissal and Zola hurriedly shoved her books into her backpack, watching as everyone else left. She had to get to the main gym before it became too busy because she wanted to work out. So she slung her bag over her shoulder, rushing to her locker as all the other students poured out of the building.

She changed in the bathroom because she didn't want the other girls to notice her bloated stomach. Zola hadn't exactly looked pregnant, but she knew the girls who were jealous of her and Arnice would spread rumors. Not that there hadn't already been rumors spread about her and him, mostly by the girls who liked him and Arnice himself.

She then remembered that she had left her gym bag in her favorite teachers room, Mrs. Jasper. Mrs. Jasper was a skinny, red haired lady in her mid thirties that was known around as "Mama Jasper". It was because she loved the kids so much she would skydive without a parachute if they asked her to. She was there to talk and open to kids having bad days. But rather than sending them out to talk to a counselor, she was right there, making sure they had the option of talking to her, or whomever they felt most comfortable.

As she arrived at the classroom, she noticed the door was open but Mrs. J wasn't at her desk. So she walked right into the corner of the classroom, looking through the little storage container students often kept their belongings in when they had no place else. Fear raced through her as she realized she couldn't find it until she heard the sound of someone clearing their throat and she turned around, the tall figure dangling the straps of the bag nonchalantly from their hand.

"I believe you're looking for this." He implies and she gasps, running over to grab for it.

"What the heck are you doing with my bag, you perv!" She spat, glaring directly into his evil eyes.

"I have a proposition for you; And in exchange, your bag, which my buddies have filled with things you just wouldn't want to be seen with." His lips curl into a mischievous grin.

"I couldn't care less what's in that bag!" She spat again, her voice now wavering nervously.

"You will once you hear what I've got to say; So what do you say, Zo-Zo? Are you in or not? Because I'd hate for everyone to know that my psycho, _pregnant,_ ex girlfriend tried to come on to me, and several of my buddies." He proposes, Zola gasping as condoms, pills and bottles of lube poured out of her duffle.

"So I'm gonna ask you again, are you in?" He finishes, watching Zola squirm in fear.


	7. Hello, from the other side

Hey Guys! This chapter is kind of (Intense?)? Anyway, I'd like to give it a warning as it verges closer to 'M' just for references to rape and prostitution. Anyways, if you make it to the end of the chapter you'll notice I threw in a nostalgic (and probably overused cliché) but I thought it'd be really sweet dream sequence. Hope you enjoy and leave some suggestions for some great twists I could throw in! Enjoy~ perFANfection

* * *

"Where are we?" Zola took in with disgust as she drove through the deep woods, no human interaction to be seen whatsoever.

"Shut up and drive, stupid." He demands, and she feels the back edge of the pocket knife push deeper against her skin, because the blackmail in her bag hadn't apparently seemed enough.

There was a small cabin on the edge of the woods, just above a small cliff. It was rather modern and classy looking, and she wondered how a guy like him could ever have anything this nice in his life that he _actually_ deserved, let alone another woman. But she pulled his red ford explorer (which she thought with rich parents he'd at least get a nicer car) up the rocky path, and throw the gear into park. He then forced her to quickly remove her buckle and exit the car, walking tensely up the steps and through the door.

Inside were at least a half dozen of his buddies, laughing, drinking, and the smell of pot lingered as if someone had left a skunk to marinate in there for years. It was all too much, and she exhaled to keep the smoke from entering her lungs, let alone affect her unborn baby.

"What are they doing here?" Zola asked.

"I promised them a little show." He explained mischievously.

He walked behind her, wrapping his arms around her neck and whispering in her ear and trying to explain what he meant, and she gasped. There was no way that she would ever allow him to do her wrong again, even if it meant death.

"No." She shakily spits out, trying not to let them have their pleasure of seeing her scared and giving in.

"You might want to reconsider." He points to her bag that was lying across the chair, and his knife that was on top.

"I'd rather die!" She screamed bravely.

He smirked amused, knowing fair well that she was on;y bluffing. After all, was it really so hard for her to give herself up for just a few photos, compared to the whole school seeing what a trashy girl her really believed she was. It was hate fueled of course, and he wanted nothing to ruin her life for her ruining his. He wanted to believe that she was crazy and the baby was just a lie for him to feel trapped and guilted into staying. But she knew he was ill.

"Very well… But one last chance to reconsider." He weighed.

"You can't hurt me; I'm pregnant so that would be double homicide." She warned him.

"And I have six other buddies to testify the fact that you're mentally ill and came onto me. You were after all, seen on the school parking lot cameras driving me away." He reminded her. "Self defense."

"What do you really want from me, Arnice?" She whimpers, feeling herself slowly shred apart.

"When the baby is born, I want you to sell the baby to one of my friends, and bring me the money. We don't ever have to talk again, be seen again, and I'll be able to flee the country."

"I would never!" She growled.

"You know, after caucasian males, mixed babies are pretty popular. Did the research myself, you're welcome." He grinned, his teeth and eyes like evil toothpicks. "My friends and I already made the plan, you just need to corporate."

"Or else what?" She tested.

"Or you're both going to have one heck of a difficult life, and I'll see to it when my mother's lawyer gets involved."

She bites her lower lip and subconsciously moves her hand to her stomach, almost as a protective instinct. She couldn't give in, this was not who she was, yet as she became more and more attached to the baby and this pregnancy, she knew as a mother it wasn't her time to be selfish.

"Fine." She spat.

"Good, we can go then. I knew you wouldn't give into the pictures so I really got what I wanted by bringing you out here; Reverse psychology." He knew he had won and it made his smile grow by a million, though she could just picture the heart she believed he might still have was shrivelling.

He waved her out, following closely behind her, and dangling her duffle bag over his shoulder. He climbed into the car, waiting for her to do the same. But before she could throw it into reverse he leaned over, running his hands through her hair and smiling as he unbuckled himself from his seat.

She knew he wanted to kiss her and could smell the liquor on his breath. He had been drinking during school again, she knew it. He had usually carried it in his sisters 'Hello Kitty' metal water bottle and none of his buddies made fun of him because they knew the truth.

But she wasn't gonna let him get away with it this time, and quickly remembered something, a story her mom had told her after work one day. So with quick thinking she pressed her foot on the brake, "Bumping" the shift into 'drive', and slamming the gas pedal to the floor. Everything sped up around her as quickly as it also stopped, and before she knew it the hood of the car was on fire, and he was gone, a giant portion of the windshield missing. She noticed she was covered in blood, but she wasn't sure if it was hers or his.

 **-XXX-**

Flashing lights flashed in the reflection of what was left of the windshield. Zola shook in the restraint of her seatbelt as her distant gaze was stuck on Arnice's body, slowly rising and falling, no more than maybe a few breaths a minute, she counted. Sirens blared through the emptiness of the woods, his friends long gone upon hearing the impact, realizing that they were in for some trouble.

"Ms., what's your name?" She suddenly hears a male voice demand from outside the car.

"Uh...uh…" She stammers, clearly in shock as adrenaline pumped through her body.

She hadn't looked injured, at least not severely, and nothing hurt. She knew she couldn't be that lucky, that something at least had to be broken, and the adrenaline kept her from feeling pain. Or maybe it was just whiplash, but she knew for a fact that Arnice wasn't as lucky. Would she be charged with attempted murder? Why hadn't she thought of that first, instead of putting herself and her baby in danger? She suddenly felt stupid and selfish, acting on a flight or fight instinct before thinking it through.

"My baby?" She suddenly regains her speech as if it was an instinct, but he doesn't answer immediately.

"She's pregnant Phil." He suddenly turns to his buddy, and they grow more concerned, turning back to her as they tried to remain calm. "We're gonna get you out of there, you don't look to bad. But we don't know about your baby or boyfriend. They're going to take you to the hospital as soon as we can get you out."

Everything around her felt slow, distant, and scary. She knew they had lifted Arnice off the hood since he was gone, but she didn't remember it happening. She felt perfectly fine but the paramedics insisted she be put on a stretcher and carried away. It was suddenly that she forgot that she had called them and wondered why they were there, suggesting that she could have a concussion.

The ride was bumpy and uneven, and even very loud as the sirens screamed through the streets, onto more even ground compared to the gravel path of the woods. She prayed that they wouldn't take her to Grey-Sloan, any other hospital. She didn't want her mother to worry until there was something to worry about, and she knew she was already in lots of trouble. She would need to rely on her parents, but not until all the details were there and the story was set straight, rehearsed in her mind.

"She hypertensive." She hears someone say and she feels slightly annoyed, compelled to remind them she's pregnant and under a lot of stress. Of course her blood pressure would be sky high after _this_.

The ambulance doors fly open and she catches sight of the familiar blue scrubs and yellow gowns they wear when trauma cases come in. She knew Arnice was already there, he was in the ambulance ahead of her. She wondered if they put two and two together and figured Zola was with them, or thought nothing of it since they were broken up for awhile now.

"What do we got?" She hears Owen ask as the stretcher is lifted down, and she hears no answer. He's got it figure out.

"Does Dr. Grey know?" He asks around, every one of the interns shaking their heads.

"Zola Shepherd, age sixteen. Found out on the trails of Lucy Creek." The paramedic finally replies.

She saw Owen's wrinkled forehead above her, examining her as they wheeled her in, the interns pattering with urgency behind him, like lost little ducklings, eager to please.

"It's okay Zola, we'll make sure everything is okay, and take great care of you." He smiles reassuringly.

"Does my mom know? Does she know we're here?" She frantically looks around, feeling her neck restrained by a brace.

They looked at her confused, until they realized she meant her ex. Owen nodded with the comforting smile still on his face. Darcy, the smallest intern, took her hand.

"He's gonna be okay." She informed her, and Zola burst into tears, becoming unresponsive.

"She's got a minor pneumothorax, it looks like there's a few broken bones, and…" Owen begins to inform them before getting interrupted.

"And she's pregnant; Someone page Dr. Robbins." Dr. Jameson demands.

 **-XXX-**

"What do we have here?" Maggie asks as she snaps her gloves over her yellow trauma gown.

She knew it was Zola on the table, she had emotionally tried to prepare herself for what to expect, but when she saw Zola like that, bloody and barely conscious, she grew concerned. But Jameson seemed more confused with the fact that she was off probation when he had paged Dr. Dickerson instead, their on-call cardiothoracic surgeon.

"Zola Shepherd, sixteen. Has a pneumothorax and seems to be developing cardiomyopathy. "

"Well Jameson, that might be because she's pregnant too, so she's pumping more blood to her baby as she's losing some." Maggie snaps sarcastically, trying not to focus on the fact that it was her niece on the table and stay professional.

Maggie put her stethoscope in her ears, listening for rapid breath sounds,any leaks in her lungs, anything to clarify what Jameson was telling her. Everything matched up and she cringed on the inside when she realized that relieving the pressure in was only part of the world of pain Zola was going to be in.

"Aunt Ma-geee?" Zola slurs her G's together as the soft "G" sound and Maggie looks to Jameson.

"Page Dr. Shepherd; It seems that she might have a slight concussion." Maggie informs him.

As Jameson leaves he bumps into Arizona, who was just on her way from the Attendings lounge, meeting with Amelia and one of her past residents that had been at Grey Sloan years before, only before a near death experience had forced her to give up her career.

"W.. where'sss Arnice?" Zola tries to look around, being restraint by Maggie who was trying to keep her from moving.

"Is she free associating, or is he really here?" Maggie asks Jameson and when he shrugged, demanded he found out, before turning to Zola.

"You're safe Zola. This is a safe place and we're gonna take care of you and your baby. You don't have to worry about him, just you and baby, okay?" Maggie comforts her, before looking to Owen.

"Jameson is gonna get another order from a doctor out there who doesn't know we already have him as our intern, and forget what he was assigned to do. Maybe I should go check?" Maggie asked him.

"No, you stay with Zola. Your anger towards your niece's ex may impact how you talk to him, given that he's here. You're biased." Owen smiles, slightly throwing shade towards Maggie who just a few months before, had punched him for the sake of Amelia.

Five minutes after being paged 9-1-1, Arizona rolled in on her skates, a sense of urgency in the way her heels screeched to a halt, seeing that Zola was the one lying on the table. She felt shock, seeing her daughter's best friend and the Chief of General's daughter lying there, still partly conscious. She wasn't sure if Meredith had been paged or not, but she knew she would want to be there.

"Oh my Gosh! Does Meredith know?" Arizona asks as she holds a doppler to Zola's stomach, searching for a heartbeat.

A faint heartbeat whirrs and they all sigh, relieved and thankful that it was there, even if it was faint. She was still bleeding a little bit, but Arizona could fix it and avoid hemorrhaging. Zola was in better shape than Arnice, who took more of the blow because the tree they had hit was on the passenger side. She wasn't told any of this yet, but everyone suspected foul play, considering that Zola absolutely detested her ex, and hadn't spoken of him since she found out she was pregnant. He had made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with the baby, at least that's what they knew.

"Meredith doesn't know and shouldn't be interrupted from surgery until Zola checks out fine. There's no need to worry her now! Understand!" Maggie firmly commands, looking around the room, waiting for everyone to nod.

"Zola?!" Amelia gasps as she stands in the corner of the room, looking at her niece laying barely conscious in trauma room 2.

"It doesn't matter who it is, it matter more than you do your job and make sure she's okay!" Maggie snaps, surprising firm and focused than usual.

When April had been lying on this table eight years ago, Maggie had been frantically commanding the interns around, making sure they were on top of their game as well as everyone else. She knew not to push Epi so it didn't pool, and even though she was concerned about Jackson knowing, she kept on top of her game. Today was different, she was the one trying to focus everyone in order to save her dear niece. It didn't matter whether it was Ellis, Bailey, or Zola, or even a complete stranger, their focus was saving the life of a patient, no special treatment.

She imagined Zola like she imagined a John Doe, as someone with a future, a family they were supposed to be going home to before something tragic happened, and fought like crazy to save them, even though there was only so much she could do before it was out of her hands, and she'd like to believe, into God's. Either way, she wanted Zola to be okay, she wished it wasn't happening, and she prayed that Zola and the baby would be okay.

"Zola? It's Aunt Amelia. Can you tell me where you are?" Amelia asks as she shines the flashlight pen into Zola's eyes.

"Arn..aneeecce?" She slurs, looking around her. "Is he gone?"

"He's in the other room. Can you tell me where you are?" Amelia asks again.

"Is he gone?" Zola asks again, a little more frantically, this time with fearful tears in her eyes. "Did he take the baby?" She frantically searches around, everyone exchanging confused glances.

Amelia shakes her head, looking up to Arizona and Maggie for direction. Owen reappears in his surgery scrubs, Jameson trailing behind him like a puppy with its tail between its legs. He looked as if he had just been screamed at, and followed closely on Owen's trail as he grabbed a suture kit, shoving it into Jameson's hands. He had just taken Arnice into surgery and brought Jameson back to help on Zola's case.

"The baby is okay, and Arnice is being taken into surgery." Arizona informs her and Zola cries even harder.

It was becoming clear that despite the head injury Zola remembered something about being with Arnice, even though it wasn't exactly clear to her. She seemed afraid, and they didn't know if it was something to do with Arnice, the crash, or both. So Arizona told Owen to call in some officers, encouraging him to do it discreetly in order not to scare Zola.

"Find out Arnice's side of the story when he wakes from surgery. Zola's not able to defend herself so we'd like to hear his first and match them, because I'm sure he'll take advantage of the fact that she'd barely conscious of what happened. We won't tell her what he said, but we'll ask her questions like why he was with her and such." Arizona demands of Owen and he nods.

"I'll page you when I'm out of surgery." He walks out.

"Okay Zo, Dr. Bailey's gonna come in and check you out since you have some minor internal bleeding, then Dr. Nickerson is gonna take you up for surgery on your chest, since Maggie can't operate on family.."

Zola's eyes grow frantic and though she can't speak her eyes say it all. She looks around, her breathing heavy and quick as it fogs up her mask, and she shakes all over. She hated the idea of surgery, she hated the idea that Arnice nearby, even though it was a good sign that she hadn't completely lost her memory or her ability to identify danger.

"Don't worry Zo, Dr. Nickerson is the best. She's gonna fix you right up alongside Dr. Bailey, and we'll be watching from the gallery the entire time." Amelia smiles as she strokes back Zola's hair, matted with dried blood clots.

It was the last thing Zola remembered her aunt saying before she was suddenly being wheeled up to surgery. She didn't exactly remember anything else because no one was exactly talking to her anymore, and when they were, it was all a blur of medical terms and such.

"Mmmmmom?" She mumbled as they were putting the anesthesia mask over her face, trying to push it out of the way.

"She's right here and she'll be waiting for you after surgery. But she would want us to help you get better first." Dr. Bailey smiles before letting the anesthesiologist continue.

 **-XXX-**

 _Zola's eyes fluttered open and she sat up quickly, looking around the strange, nursing home like building she was in. She didn't know where she was or why she was there, but she noticed that she was alone and healed. She turned her body, jumping off of the table that she was sitting on, curiously roaming around the room until she caught sight of herself in a mirror that was hanging on the wall._

 _Her face was wrinkled at the corners of her mouth, and there were crow's feet on her eyes from exhaustion. She looked no older than her mid to late twenties, and she noticed that her hair was drawn back in a pony and her body was clothed in scrubs. She wasn't sure how she had gotten there, or where her baby was, because she no longer was pregnant. The tiny bloated belly was gone, and her empty, bloody hands were now carrying a purse instead of her backpack._

 _She didn't know what motivated it, but she dug through the purse that wasn't hers, finding a picture of the day her baby was born in the wallet, and a nice couple that she didn't know holding the baby next to Zola's bedside. She thought they looked familiar, but she couldn't' put her finger on it. All she knew what that baby in the picture, the one in the yellow blanket, was hers. Keyword: Was._

 _She searched some more, digging through clutter until she paused, startled by the plastic card in her purse, and a cap that had ferry boats on it._

" _This is for you, Zo. Your father would want you to wear this, for luck."_

 _Suddenly a memory of Maggie pops in her head, the two of them digging through Meredith's drawer as they were packing her things, and Meredith staring in the window, lighting up as she saw the blue cap._

" _Take it; Your mom would want it for you too." Maggie smiles reassuringly._

" _Derek's scrub cap; You found it." Meredith glowed, grabbing it from Maggie and rubbing it on her face, no longer able to identify the smell, long gone from years of sitting in the old dresser drawer._

 _Zola looked at the badge in her had, reading it aloud._

" _Zola Shepherd, inter. Grey-Sloan memorial?" She was stunned, not even a trace of a memory of even attending medical school._

" _Mrs. Shepherd? Your daughter is here." Zola hears a voice in the room around the corner and jumps when she realized she's suddenly there._

 _Meredith rocks back and forth in the chair by the window, smiling as she watched the ferry boats on the lake, though she's not quite sure what appeases her about them anymore. She just remembered that someone she loved dearly loved them, so she did too._

" _Mom?" Zola's voice quivers and she holds out the scrub cap and watched her mother light up in delight._

" _Ferry boats? How did you know I loved them?" She asked, confused a little bit._

" _Dad loved them and I know you loved dad, so I'm going to wear it on my first day of work." Zola informs her, suddenly surprised by the information herself, despite not remembering anything moments before._

 _Meredith furrows her eyebrows, studying the cap and the brown eyed girl holding it. There was something that drew excitement out of Meredith from the scrub cap and the girl holding it, but she didn't know what._

" _What's your name?" Meredith asks the girl holding the scrub cap, trying to pinpoint why it felt important to her._

" _It's me mom, Zola." Zola's eyes saddened, as it occurred to her what happened; Her mother's past was now Zola's future._


	8. Wanted Dead or Alive

**Chapter 8**

Meredith carried post-ops from her appendectomy to the nurses' station for one of the nurses to give to her interns for scut. She grumbled as she realized this was the last surgery of the day and not one exciting surgery that day. Of course she was thankful no one was hurt or dying, but her day felt as if it had dragged on, even though everyone around her seemed nervous and edgy.

She had gotten used to some nurses whispering about Zola and though she hated the things they said, she rose above the drama, and knew there were still nurses who actually knew Zola that knew she wasn't actually a trashy girl, but a young, scared girl who made a mistake. But this particular day there seemed to be something else going on, and it wasn't until Dr. Bailey came alongside her with her post-ops that things changed.

"What are you starin' at, Grey?" Bailey asks as she continues writing.

"I was just wondering if you had anymore surgeries for me before I leave?" She sheepishly asks.

"Grey, I've had a long day and I'm sure you have too. But you're an attending and you need to ask me, a fellow attending, to assign you surgeries, when you're the chief of general? What is this, intern year?" Bailey snaps, seemingly more tense than normal.

Meredith dropped it until Bailey cleared her throat, looking up from her paperwork with sorrow painted on her face. Meredith was sure this was going to be a Bailey speech followed up with an apology, but it wasn't long until she recognized the look as something doctors often gave their patients after delivering bad news.

"Grey, there's also something we need to talk about." Her voice wavers nervously.

"Which one of them?" Meredith asks Bailey, jumping to conclusions immediately that it was one of her kids in trouble. "Were you just in surgery with them?" She suddenly catches her voice wavering and raising in fear.

"Zola." She replies flatly. "She was in a crash but she's stable and the baby is fine. They're both being monitored by Arizona and April. She has good surgeons on her side Grey. But if you'd like to go see her…" Bailey finishes but is cut off by Meredith who slams shut her paperwork and hurries off.

"SHE'S IN ROOM 2170!" Bailey shouts after her.

The nurses begin to whisper in shock, ignoring the fact that Bailey had snapped around to stare at them in disbelief.

"Do you guys have nothing better to do than rip on doctors and gossip all day?" She asks them, and the cower.

"Maybe if Meredith, a 'Harper-Avery award winning' know-it-all doctor had talked to her daughter, she wouldn't have gotten pregnant and she wouldn't be in this mess." One nurse remarked and the other nodded.

"Yeah, I hear she went psycho on her ex boyfriend. If you ask me, Meredith really isn't the doctor everyone talks her up to be." The other adds and Bailey begins to feel her blood boil beneath her skin.

"NO-ONE WAS ASKING YOU!" She rose her voice, then took a deep breath to keep from losing her poise. "Meredith Grey is only human!"

"She's a doctor and her daughter still got pregnant! It's awfully ironic." Nurse Cara pointed out.

"Meredith Grey is a fantastic doctor; I'd know because _I_ was the resident who raised her. But being a doctor isn't a reflection of how she should be a mother to her child or who she truly is as a parent! You know as well as I do that people here die everyday and it's not always a reflection on us as much as it was out of our control. We did what we could! But being the fantastic doctor that she is, Meredith Grey can NOT be babysitting her kids all day, to keep the pregnancy from happening.."

"Well, Meredith could've done a little more to stop this from happening. Her daughter should be punished more than grounding. If it was my kid, I'd have her sent to a camp for pregnant girls."

"Well let's thank the good lord above that Zola was lucky _NOT_ to have you as her mother then. And as for Meredith Grey, she handled it in a way that was good for her family and not anyone else."

The nurse rolled her eyes to the other, brushing off what Bailey had to say, and ignoring the fact that Bailey was still there as she continued talking.

"As if the pregnancy wasn't punishment enough, she had to have such a lazy and irresponsible mom. You'd think a doctor would have better resources to talk to her child about sex. She's never gonna get the proper punishment or talk for this." Betty, the older nurse remarked.

Bailey really wanted to rise above, but Meredith was her baby. The intern she had raised to be a resident that became the amazing, award winning surgeon and mother she was today. If you'd ask Bailey or not, she'd advocate for every one of her intern babies. She had raised them, witnessed their growth, went through loss with them, and now that only Alex and Meredith were left, she wanted nothing more than to protect them while leaving them room to still fend for themselves. And she'd do the same for their kids.

"Meredith knows that punishment isn't always what's best, or is better served with a life lesson. And I'm sure she knows that Zola knows what she did was wrong, but shaming the poor girl isn't going to do anything, because she already knows. It's redundant and mean to keep shaming her. She's a fantastic more by giving her daughter room to grow as a person instead of bringing her down!" Bailey turns on her heels, gathering her things and preparing to check on Zola.

Cara and Betty scuff, brushing Bailey off because of their annoyance towards her "momma bear" instincts coming out. Little did they know, she wasn't done with them.

"However, this in no means means that Meredith is lazy or bad parent. Zola is plenty old to make choices for herself and Meredith heard her out, heard her side of the story, and is helping her find the right path. You don't know what goes on in that house behind closed doors, or what happens, so you have no right to sit here and judge her parenting when you know only a little gossip about their family issues."

Bailey begins to walk away, but remembers one more thing she wanted to add, stunning the nurses and hopefully scaring them into line.

"So you, nurse Betty and Cara, can take your fabulous parenting skills that you think you have and go tell Zola and her mom what you think they should do, but remember that I have the authority to fire you for harassing patients. So, I'd suggest you keep it to yourself, and if I hear of you harassing others again I will have you out on your behinds." Bailey finishes, smiling as she walks away.

 **Chapter 9**

"Dr. Shepherd? You have someone here in the waiting room to see you? She says she's an old colleague." Andrew Jameson approaches her in the CT room, watching as she runs over scans of a brain again.

"Tell her to come up to CT. She'll know where to go." She informs her plainly, too invested into her work.

She runs through the pages on the computer, searching every angle of the brain; The frontal lobe, the right and left hemispheres, anything that would indicate that the tumor had returned. As she searched she prayed to God that it would be benign, and that if it wasn't the brain, the liver on the patient hadn't been ruined from all the drinking. But before she could worry about going downstairs to the machine in the pit, she heard a subtle knock in the doorway.

"Dr. Shepherd? It's been forever!" She hears the familiar voice exclaim, relief almost in it as if they had been forcefully kept apart.

"Edwards!" Her concerned, down turned frown becomes a genuine smile as she stands, embracing the black girl in a hug.

She lets go of Edwards in surprise, feeling a hard lump and quickly realizing in excitement that Stephanie had a well kept secret.

"NO?! You're pregnant?" Amelia gasps in excitement

She was surprised, knowing that Edwards' mind seemed like it had always been occupied by neurosurgery that kids seemed like a distant, maybe even not possible thing for her. She was focused, newly married, and she had made it clear that kids was something she might consider down the line. She was serious about her work as was Cristina, except Edwards thought that eventually she'd hit pause to start a family.

Cristina didn't want to be a parent because she believed she would've been a terrible parent. She was so focused that she felt that it wouldn't be fair for the child, that she would be like Ellis and the kid would probably feel like a burden.

She didn't want that life for her children, and Amelia respected her for knowing what she wanted. Even if the pro-life and pro-choice thing held differed for each of them. But like she told Edwards, she had nothing but respect for the both of them as surgeons and the choices they would make for their careers.

"Congratulations! I'm ecstatic that the baby neurosurgeon I once mentored is now back in the medical field and is going to be a mommy!" She gloats, feeling happy but a familiar disheartened tug in her chest.

They sat in the chair and Amelia began clicking through the scans, showing Edwards what exactly she was looking at. What was the deal with these scans and why was Amelia looking for help from Stephanie? Maybe it was because Meredith had a lot going on that she felt another tumor would be a burden on her too. That Meredith would say "I told you so" when Amelia found a tumor that had been causing a behavior change. Or what if it wasn't a brain tumor making her sick? What if she was in early stage liver failure and she didn't show common symptoms yet?

"Edwards,even if we don't find something, I don't want you to tell anyone! Do you hear me? The last thing I need is for Meredith to have another reason to get me a psych consult."

"No offense Shepherd, but you do have a lot going on right now and Meredith does have valid reasons to worry. You've been drinking again and Lord only knows what else you could have in your system."

"Edwards, are you accusing me of doing drugs? Did Meredith put you up to something? Did you talk to her?" Amelia begins to ramble and Stephanie laughs.

"Not at all. I'm just worried for you! You're worrying yourself over what looks like is probably nothing. Why don't we go over your symptoms?"

"That's the problem! I didn't realize my brain tumor was there until I had a scan, because I didn't realize right away that there were any symptoms until I thought back over my behavior."

It was true; She hadn't realized that her impulsive behavior was a problem. She had always been head strong and determined. To solve inoperable tumors, to take on cases that seemed just like her charity cases. It was in her blood to want to help. It was a good impulsive behavior until it wasn't. It became daring and dangerous, risk taking. But even with all that, she still hadn't cheated. But this time was different.

She craved alcohol like it was narcotics. It made her sick, the hangovers in the mornings sucked. There were headaches all day and blurry vision. Nausea, stomach aches. The blurry vision and the headaches were what made her wonder if it was a tumor, not her sudden impulsive decision making. And the more she thought about it, it wasn't a rash decision to leave Owen. If anything, he already was emotionally gone years ago. Shortly after Leo and Betty were placed in permanent care.

"Dr. Shepherd? Nausea, headaches, dizziness, all of those things don't necessarily mean another tumor. It could be something more common. Do you think there's any chance, any chance at all, that you could be, I don't know, pregnant?"

Amelia's jaw dropped and she stared at Edwards in disbelief. Stephanie felt slight embarrassment and somewhat bad that she had even asked because she knew Owen was gone. She had seen the Facebook posts and everything, she had seen him with Teddy in the snow in Germany. She figured by deductive reasoning that the two weren't exactly on great terms. And it was then, in the awkward moment of silence that Amelia broke down, laughing hysterically at Edwards.

"Dr. Shepherd, this is inappropriate. Maybe we should look at the little girl's scans instead? Take your mind off of this for a bit?" Edwards face burned a rosy red on her cheeks.

"No Edward's, I want some peace of mind. And if that means ruling out all of the possibilities, then we'll do it. And we'll start by ruling out pregnancy since I had a blood test a few months ago and it was negative."

"False negatives happen. Even with our standard tests." Steph insists. "Haven't you ever seen those shows where women don't know they're pregnant until birth?" She adds sheepishly.

"Are you taking medical advice from a fake reality show over our actual medical practice?" Amelia begins to chuckle.

"Just think about it; It's called 'cryptic pregnancy'. Sometime the HCG hormone isn't strong enough to show up because it's too early or your body isn't or hasn't been producing enough. C'mon Dr. Shepherd! You know weird cases happen all the time and we can't rule anything out until we're sure!"

Stephanie persists, watching Amelia sigh and give in, and watches as Amelia begins to scribble out a list of everything they can think of to rule out.

"We can't do millions of dollars of tests, but we can do the all the obvious things. And if we still don't find anything, then we'll hit the books. But don't let me down Edwards! I didn't call you because I thought you'd be great company." She assures her firmly, sarcasm dripping from her lips.

"Yes Ma'am." Steph responds, standing and heading down to run labs, given special permission already from Bailey to have privileges in the hospital.

"I'm not pregnant; It's gotta be a small, microscopic tumor. Because there's no way I can be pregnant or I'm going to mess up my baby from drinking." She whispers to herself, feeling very guilt all of a sudden.

 **-XXX-**

"How is she?" Meredith slides on a trauma gown as she enters the ICU.

"Her vitals are stable for now, she sustained minor head and chest injuries but we put in a chest tube, took out her intubation tubes and she is now breathing on her own. Her head injury is mild so most likely she'll regain her memory and then the police requested to speak to her since the accident looked most likely purposeful."

Jameson flipped through the chart on the table, getting ready to administer another CC of Lorazepam to help with the anxiety she had came in with earlier and would most likely still be fearful when she woke.

"What makes you say that Jameson?" Meredith asks as she snatched the chart from his hands.

"I don't think she would purposefully go out into the middle of nowhere just to crash her car unless it was intentional. They have reason to believe it might have been attempted homicide or suicide."

"What?!" Meredith asks in alarm, even more confused. "Who was she trying to kill? Who came in with her?" She demands to know.

"Amelia informed me that she was with her ex. I think his name was…" He began only to be interrupted.

"Arnice? That bag of trash was with her? Then this couldn't have been planned or intentional. He kidnapped her!"

Meredith paced angrily back and forth, slamming the chart down and not minding the fact that her daughter was sleeping. Thoughts began to burn in her mind, things that scared her and she feared, but they hadn't much information and couldn't only help so much because they knew the police and psych would be in to question the kids.

"Actually Dr. Grey, Zola was the one driving, so they believe she was trying to either kill them both, or they had gone out there to you know, 'Sneak around' ? And maybe they had just gone out there to be alone, and maybe knocked the car into drive."

"STOP!" Meredith snaps, sudden fear and anger in her voice. "This was totally purposeful and I think Zola may have been protecting herself and the baby."

"By driving into a tree?" Jameson asked, clear confusion on his face.

"NO! She was smart, so smart! She purposefully did it because she didn't want 'it'! Jameson, we had a case years ago where this young girl was found half naked. She and her boyfriend seemed to have "accidentally" driven off a cliff while getting busy. But she was protecting herself from him."

"Why?"

"Because he was a rapist that would later attempt to burn down our hospital!" She snapped, trying to catch him up to speed as her heart raced.

She knew if they had more proof, that once the kids gave their stories and they looked at the evidence, once Meredith had presented her case, that Zola could be scott-free. Zola was innocent, she entirely believed that, and if anything, Meredith was proud of her daughter's sense. Even if it was a little bit of an unconventional approach, she and the baby were so far unharmed.

"Jameson, go upstairs and pull Alison Goodman's case file! And print out any articles you can find! There were lots of news articles at the time so there shouldn't be any trouble."

"Dr. Grey, doesn't that break the patient's confidentiality!" He points out.

"Do you second guess all your attendings' orders?" She snaps sassily at him. "Go!" She demands, watching him exit in obedient fear.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey guys! I know it's been a minute since I posted, but I'm really trying to take my time and think of a great twist or detailed plot line instead of just trying to publish a bunch of chapters. Quality over quantity. I want this to be well thought out while still keeping the readers attention, to make something worth turning the pages (or scrolling) for. Anyways, thank you for being patient and for sticking with it! I appreciate and read all reviews and am very open to constructive criticism (Keyword, constructive) and ideas or suggestions for future chapters or on my writing. Enjoy! It's a shorter one but it took a while!**

"Dr. Grey, we're here because you requested we file a police report on, Arnice Hollister? Do you have reason to believe this wasn't accidental?" The rounded man asks, flipping his notepad open.

"No, I've brought you here because it's been a slow day in the ER." She snaps at him sarcastically before becoming serious again. "Right this way." She leads him down the hall, gladly to Arnice's room.

Zola was lying in her room, battered and bruised but when she woke she didn't care because she would find out her baby was all right. Arizona sewed her cervix closed to stop bleeding and lower the risk of miscarriage.

Owen had done repairs on various parts on her traumatized body, and Amelia was going to finish the surgery by suctioning out her brain bleed after Owen had left. It was unprofessional yes, but she didn't want anyone clouding her ability to concentrate. But since she was family, Dr. Webber had granted Edwards privileges to operate instead.

Stephanie was now sitting with Zola, waiting for her to wake up while Amelia was in another surgery. Amelia couldn't just sit around waiting to hear something, but could operate knowing she was in good hands while she was helping others.

"Mmphh?" Zola groaned, drawing in a long, deep breath that turned into a sudden panic when she realized that there had been a tube down her throat.

"It's okay, you're okay." Stephanie quickly stands up, helping her remove the tube before smiling. "You've had an accident." Stephanie informs her calmly.

Zola holds her bandaged head as she continues to shake in Stephanie's arms, searching frantically around the room as if she was searching for something but it kept darting out of her sight. That was how fast her eyeballs were moving. She was scared. She hurt. And now she was light headed from hyperventilating. Stephanie grabbed a mask, breathing in and out to show her how.

"Is he alive? Is he here?" She finally feels the words escape cruelly from her swollen lips.

"He's in the ICU." Stephanie tries to reassure her, trying not to startle her more.

"Please tell me he's gone. Tell me they couldn't save him, that I'm safe, that baby is safe. Please…" Her voice breaks, quivering. "Please tell me he's gone. Tell me we're safe."

Zola feels hot, angry tears flood her eyes and her hand subconsciously goes to her stomach. Arizona and Jameson appear in the doorway, watching as Edwards crawls into the bed beside her, resting the young girls head in the crook of her shoulder.

"Please, make the carousel stop turning! I wanna get off, even if I have to jump." She cries, Edwards shushing her.

"Um, Zola." Arizona finally announces her presence. "I'm here to check up on your baby. They seemed fine in surgery on the monitor, but I'm just here to do a follow up." She gently states, coming closer.

"And they're here to take your police report when they're done with Arnice and you feel up to it." Jameson adds as head whip angrily in his direction.

"P..police report?!" She suddenly panicked again. "What? No, no, I can't… they can't! What are they doing here?" She yelled at him.

Her monitors sped up, her blood pressure and heart rate rising until it became alarming. Jameson's face dropped when he realized he had once again put Zola and her family through hell again, once again failing as an intern.

"Jameson, please leave." Arizona asks of him as she races to Zola's side.

"She's tachycardic." Stephanie informs them as they recline Zola's bed.

"Slow it down before her heart fails! I don't want to have to defibrillate a pregnant woman!" Arizona demands furiously, pressing on Zola's stomach and checking her for anything abnormal before examining her stitches.

Zola's mask clouds as she breathes rapidly into it. She had been through enough, the carousel was spinning faster and the only thing left was to pass out from it. So she let herself go, watching as she eyelids fluttered shut and everything became quiet around her. She didn't care that her heart was close to stopping, or that people were frantically moving to save her. She just wanted some darn peace and quiet for once. To think about nothing being engulfed in darkness and with her baby. After all, sleep was the only time she felt truly alone. Alone in a dream like state….

 **-XXX-**

 _Zola woke to be greeted once again by a dream-like state. The sun was warm and all encompassing on her skin, and the grass was plush beneath her feet. She didn't know where she was this time, or why her mind was riding on weird waves of strange dreams, but she knew she had felt safe._

 _This time, in this dream, she was still pregnant. The only difference was no scrubs, she was still her teenage self. Only she wasn't beaten and battered and bruised. And her stomach was swollen as if she was already close to giving birth. She set her hand on her stomach, pressing and hoping to feel the baby move but didn't feel anything. Her stomach suddenly flattened under her hand, disappearing. And then a couple appeared, smiling with a baby in their arms. Was it hers? Where did he or she go?_

" _Zola, my, how you've grown. You're beautiful." She hears the woman say, smiling as she brushed her hair from her face, startling her._

" _No." Zola thought, unsure why her brain was playing cruel tricks on her, but it lit something up in her memories._

" _Aunt Lexi." She gasps, her heart stunned, feeling as if it almost stopped. Then she looked to the man, holding the baby in his arms._

" _Your dad was so right about you, and he'd love to see this." He replied, turning around to look behind him. "Derek? She's here." He excitedly shouted._

 _Suddenly her dad was beside her, tall, handsome, not a hair out of place. He hadn't aged a day, and for a second she actually believed the car accident hadn't happened._

" _Daddy?" She voice wavers, her eyes going wide as she traced his every feature as she had remembered it._

" _You shouldn't be here." He replies flatly before smiling, tugging her body into his, but she only slides through his grasp. After all, it was only a dream._

" _You're every bit as beautiful as I knew you'd grow up to be.I never had a doubt that I'd always be proud. You kids and your mother are my pride and joy after all."_

" _Daddy. I messed up my life; I'm having a baby." She admits shamefully, tears streaming down her face as she goes to hug him again, sliding through his ghostly figure._

" _It's a beautiful day to save lives." He smiles and she looks at him confused._

" _Why are you saying that?" She sniffs, wiping her hand across her snotty nose._

" _It's a beautiful day to save lives save yours, and your baby's."_

" _What do you mean?! Why do you keep saying that?" She demands again, a little more angrily._

 _Lexi and Mark step closer, Marks arm around Lexi as he smiles down at their baby, wrapped in its little blue blanket. A boy._

" _We already have our completed family here; Samuel is our adopted baby boy, go back so your baby can be adopted and happy too."_

" _Is there something wrong with my baby?" Zola demands to know but didn't get an answer. Mark and Lexi just smile at each other._

 _Lexi encourages her to leave, watching an expression of confusion paint itself more detailed on Zola's face. She wasn't sure why this was happening. She wasn't sure why they wanted her to put her baby up for adoption. What did they mean when they said they already had their 'completed family', here?_

" _Samuel Avery?" She double takes, it all starting to sink in._

" _We promised them we'd take care of him. He's ours now." Lexi looks down to him, smiling reassuringly._

" _That's impossible. He passed away after you did." Zola tries to justify._

" _We take care of each other here. But we want you to find someone to take care of yours on earth. We want you to fight for this baby, fight for their wellbeing and health, especially when you feel like something isn't right." Mark pleas, trying not to scare her._

" _Advocate for yourself, for your baby. Don't be afraid to tell them what happened or how you feel. And most importantly, be brave, speak up, and if you feel in your gut that something isn't right, be your own advocate! Demand to be heard!" Lexi's voice is fearful and shrill._

 _She reaches out, touching Zola's flattened stomach and it reappears, feeling as her baby kicks her from inside. She sighs relieved, but is confused. Where did the baby go in the first place, and why was Lexi giving them back?_

 _Zola panics as everything begins to drip away as if it was a melting painting. As everything began to blur back into reality and she didn't want to let go of this dream. She would awake feeling confused, but nonetheless listened to what they had to say. But before she crossed back over the line into reality, Derek outreached his hand, smiling brightly at her._

" _Take care of your mother, your aunts, and your siblings. Just because I'm not here physically doesn't mean I can't see when you're sassing your mother, or when you're hurting." He smiles, giving her a glance once again._

" _It's a beautiful day to save lives Zo. Not just the sick but the emotionally broken ones. Give your baby what's best for their life, save a life. But most importantly, I love you."_

 _He fades and everything goes black again, too quickly for her liking. She had so many questions but when she would wake all she would feel is pain. Pain everywhere. And she would just want to go back._


End file.
